Running the Show

Episode Report Card
Kim: B | 1 USERS: A+
Coach Kool-Aid

Redemption Island Duel. All of Te Tuna is there to watch. Keith, Ozzy, and Jim enter and hear the rules of the duel. They have to stretch out their arms and balance a pole on the back of each hand. A board is stretched across the top of the poles so that if they let the poles drop or move too much, the board will fall and they will be out. The three men take their positions. Ozzy is in the middle and slightly behind the others; some on the forums feel this gave him an unfair advantage because he could see when the others were struggling. I don't know that the advantage is all that great, honestly. Probst pretty much tells you how the others are doing anyway, and I think your concentration would have to be such that you wouldn't be able to watch your opponents much anyway.

After ten minutes, Jim sways a little and Rick tells him to stay focused. Brandon admits to Probst that he's rooting for Jim (the only one he really got to know), and Whitney says she's rooting for Keith. If you read the tabloids, you know that she left her husband for Keith, so that's no surprise. No one admits that they are rooting for Ozzy, because everyone either hates him or is scared of the possibility of him coming back into the game. Jim goes out pretty quickly after that. Keith and Ozzy both struggle a little bit as Probst reminds them that they have to win the duel if they want a chance to get back into the game. Ozzy's poles are moving all around but he manages to keep it together. Keith loses it and Ozzy stays on Redemption Island. He hugs Jim and Keith, who will become the first two members of the jury. Ozzy tells Probst that he's loving being on Redemption Island, because he doesn't have to worry about the mental game, and can just eat fish and fruit. He promises to cook for anyone else who comes along before he sends him or her home. Ugh, he is awful. Then he gives a big speech about how he can't wait to get back in the game and see who has taken "the higher road." Humility, Ozzy. Get some. Before he leaves, Jim jokes that he's hoping for a secret double Redemption Island, but Probst tells him there's not, and he's off to the Ponderosa. Keith has no personality so he is just told that his adventure is over and he's off. And then he does the sign of the cross after dropping his buff in the fire, which is just weird.

Because we all know that the former Savaii members are going home tonight unless a miracle happens, why not spend some time with Ozzy? And as much as I can't stand Ozzy, watching him swim and fish and climb coconut trees is much more visually interesting than watching Coach do tai chi or whatever. It would be great to be able to mute this; if I weren't recapping it, I would. Anyway, as we see the pretty pictures, we have to listen to Ozzy babble about how awesome he is and how he's totally going to win the end game, because he's so refreshed and rejuvenated. But imagine him saying that with ninety percent more arrogance and pomposity.

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