Secrets And Lies And An Idol Surprise

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B | Grade It Now!
No More Hungry Minnows

It's still Day 22 as the tribe follows Jeff into a little lodge. Judd is put at a separate table of his own, and the rest of the tribe sits down in order along a long table, Jamie at the end. There are some dogs running around, so Jeff explains that they "live here." Just so you don't think they're part of the reward. Judd's steak and lobster is immediately produced, along with his beer. Cindy receives a plate of chicken and vegetables and something to drink. (Looks like white wine, maybe.) Danni receives a big plate of spaghetti, and honestly, I think my system might tolerate the spaghetti better than a giant hunk of meat when I hadn't had any meat for three weeks, so I think Danni's meal might be the one I'd have chosen if I had the choice of all of these. Steph receives a burger and a beer -- and that's the one Jamie would have had. Jeff points this out. "Nothing tastes better than my self-respect," Jamie says. Y'all, he worked on that remark all day.

Gary gets a slice of pizza. A small one. Rafe gets a ham and cheese sandwich, and people still try to look happy for him. That's about where the efforts to clap appreciatively die out. Bobby Jon gets hosed with a baked potato. One baked potato. It's going to take a lot of live minnows to make that into a meal. Lydia, thanks to Jamie, is second to last rather than last, so she gets a little fish. She is so happy that she actually becomes tearful. "I expected a cracker," she whimpers. I am totally saving that up for the next emotional moment in which I need to break the tension between myself and someone else. "[Whimper.] I expected a cracker." Finally, Jamie's ZONK! meal is a little bowl of nuts and, as a nice touch, lake water. It's been boiled, at least, Jeff promises. So it's gross, but not parasite-harboring gross.

Now, Jeff tells Judd that he can invite either one or two people to sit with him, and that those people will get his open bar, as well as dessert. Sharing will be allowed at Judd's table, and nowhere else. Judd first brings up Bobby Jon, saying that Bobby Jon has been great to him from the first day. And then he brings up Steph, saying that she's been great to him since the tribal switch. I understand why he picked Steph; the Bobby Jon pick is kind of a surprise to me. Gary seethes. Hee. Jeff also hands Judd his immunity idol clue.

Steph explains how they ordered drinks, and she adds that she split her cheeseburger with Bobby Jon -- which was pretty decent of her, all things considered. Judd even gave Bobby Jon half of his steak, and all three of them ate the lobster. Wow, everybody's being awfully decent for no apparent good reason. It's like Reward Dinner In Whoville. Danni is particularly enjoying her spaghetti. It appears that the sharp dividing line of discomfort is between Danni and her spaghetti and Gary and his bitty slice of pizza. Because with the single burger gone over to Judd's table with Steph, that leaves a bit of Bobby Jon tells us that he tried really hard not to gloat or pig out, because he felt bad about the other people. He mentions in particular looking over at Gary, who is a fairly big guy to have been given that lonely slice of pizza. Judd orders a round of vodka and cranberry juice, instructing the server to go heavy on the vodka and light on the cranberry juice. Then he tells Gary, "You're killin' me over there, kid." Gary pulls an innocent expression, chuckling and acting like he hasn't been staring hungrily and with great hatred the entire time. "I won't look at you anymore, Judd," Gary says casually. Gary interviews that, indeed, two hours of watching Judd, Bobby Jon, and Steph gobble food and get drunk wasn't exactly his idea of a good time. Imagine that. And then Judd and Bobby Jon raise the roof drunkenly, and the less said about that, the better. This is also the scene were you get to see Judd dribble his drink down his beard, which I'm sure was very attractive to someone somewhere whose opinions regarding Hot and Not are the precise opposite of mine.

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