Survivor
Seems Like A No-Brainer

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Fourth Time's A Charm

The four arrive at the challenge. Wait, what's this? Where's the stupid walk of fallen contestants? Damn! I love that walk. It wastes so much time and makes this show that much easier to recap. Now I have to recap three hours of actual content. Probst explains the challenge: each contestant must race through a maze to collect bags of puzzle pieces. There are only eight pieces, but each one is a mini-puzzle in itself that has to be solved to figure out what the letters on it are before trying to create the phrase "only you are safe" out of them. This is looks pretty difficult, and thus worthy of a Final Immunity Challenge. Probst calls go and they are off. It's a very big maze, so there's a lot of going the wrong way and getting lost from all of the contestants. Ashley decides to follow Rob and makes it to the first station just after him. Meanwhile, Phillip gets his first bag from a different station. And Natalie is running back and forth aimlessly.

Ashley and Rob get to another station and grab their second bags. Phillip also gets a second bag from a station. I will laugh my ass off if he wins this. I mean, seriously. That would almost redeem this season. Rob tries to run away and lose Ashley, but she sticks behind him. They get their third bags. Phillip has fallen behind, sadly. Natalie is whatever. Rob gets his fourth bag. Ashley is close behind. Phillip manages to find a third bag, but Rob and Ashley are now making their way to the end to solve their puzzles. As for Natalie, Probst says: "Natalie! One bag. Has only one bag." How can she possibly be this bad at this? Is she just not trying? Rob and Ashley start working on their puzzles. Somehow, Ashley manages to get two of the words: "safe" and "only." Rob doesn't have any yet, and has the balls to suggest to Ashley that they work together on this. But Ashley won't tell him what she has. And I'm not sure why he can't just bend over and look at her board, since it's right there in plain sight like that. Both contestants start piecing together the solution. It looks like Ashley has it again, but in the end, it's freaking Rob with the win. And he is fucking thrilled about it because he knows that pretty much just won him a million dollars. He screams and jumps up and down, then starts crying. So does Natalie, but only because she sucked so much in that challenge. Phillip sucks up as Rob is given the immunity necklace, saying "that was beautiful. Absolutely beautiful." Rob tearfully interviews that Amber was the person who encouraged him to come back and try this stupid game for a fourth time because she "believed" in him. Yeah, and wanted a million dollars. And probably wanted him out of her hair for a month. Rob claims that he'll be okay even if he doesn't win the million now that he's made it into the Final Three. "I feel like I did my best," he says. And then he stops being sentimental and says now he has to figure out which of the "three idiots" to send home tonight.

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Survivor

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