She Annoys Me Greatly

Episode Report Card
admin: B | 2 USERS: B-
Always Wear Sunscreen
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

Probst voiceover introduces us to this season's setting (Caramoan Islands) as we see various wildlife skittering around. Ten fans of the show (allegedly) are on a catamaran, heading to their temporary home. There are two guys who actually get talking heads - one looks like a reject from Sons of Anarchy and the other is a former Marine who served in Iraq. All of the contestants on the boat are checking one another out, trying to suss out who might be strong competition and who might be worthy of an alliance.

The other tribe, the Favorites, gets to fly in on a helicopter. This tribe consists of: Malcolm from last season, who has the advantage of no one else seeing his season yet, since this was filmed before his season aired. Cochran, the nebbishy nerd who kept flipping until everyone realized he couldn't be trusted. Dawn, whose loyalty meant she didn't join Cochran in flipping and ended up on the minority faction. Brenda, who thought she was running things until her elimination showed her she wasn't. Erik, who committed what may be the dumbest Survivor move of all time - giving up an Immunity Idol at Tribal, and then getting voted out. Of course, Brandon did the same thing, but it was less because of manipulation by others, and more because he's nutso. Andrea, who I don't really remember except that she was part of Boston Rob's harem until she wasn't. Corinne, whom I also don't remember except that she was on the season with Bob and Sugar. Phillip, the crazy guy in the pink undies. Francesca, who was voted out first in her season so why is she back again? I wouldn't say that any of these people were my favorites. I liked Malcolm all right last season, and Dawn never bugged me that much. I couldn't much care about the rest of them.

The Fans' boat arrives on the beach. The first guy off bites it into the water, which was great, because he's wearing hipster hat and glasses, so you know he thought he was super cool. Probst welcomes them and then announces that they'll be playing against returning favorites. And Malcolm, who will be a stranger to them. Probst introduces each Favorite one-by-one and the Fans offer commentary like "She's dangerous" and "That's Russell's nephew!" I would just be like, "Who?"

Probst tosses each tribe a bag full of buffs and says they're going to start out with a challenge. This Reward Challenge is sort of a "Capture the Flag" scenario. Each team puts a man and a woman on the course (which is thigh-deep water), and they have to try to grab a ring and bring it back to their own flag to earn a point while their opponents are trying to A) stop them and B) get the ring for themselves. The first tribe to earn four points wins flint and a sack of beans.

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