Episode Report Card
Sara M: B | Grade It Now!
Probst Hates Fang

With a mouth full of rice because it's not fair that he should cut back on his rice because other people apparently forced him to throw out uneaten food, G.C. confronts Randy. He asks Randy if he's trying to be the tribe leader now. Randy says no. G.C. says it sure seems like Randy's making a play for the leader position that doesn't even exist. "You sure are jumpy about it," says G.C., who has got to be the jumpiest guy in the world. You know what's jumpy? When Gillian tells the entire tribe to be quiet in the morning so she can sleep and you assume she's addressing you specifically and then quit your stupid leadership role over it. Meanwhile, Randy is looking not at all jumpy as he reclines in the hut. Randy again says he doesn't want to be the leader and tells G.C. to "drop it." Of course, G.C. has to get all pissy about Randy "ordering" him to do something and says he's allowed to ask Randy a question if he wants to. Randy says he can ignore him, then. Meanwhile, Dan observes but doesn't try to break up the fight and then complains to us that his tribe isn't unified.

Over at Kota, Marcus the Magnificent catches a fish. He holds it aloft so all can gaze upon it and cheer before handing it off to Squire Charlie. Charlie tells us the State of the Kota Union: he, Marcus, Jacquie, and Corinne are in an alliance. Kelly and Paloma seem to be good friends, and "Sugar is attached to Ace." As for Bob, he's sitting in his underwear chopping something and I don't need to see a bulge on a 57-year-old physics teacher. I just don't. Charlie thinks they can get Bob to vote with his alliance, but he's worried that Bob, Kelly, Paloma, Ace, and Sugar will figure out that the four of them have an alliance and will band together to vote them out. Not too worried, though, as he's pretty sure that the other five don't get along well enough to work with each other. Which is a very good point.

Sure enough, Kelly and Paloma are talking about how much they hate Ace. And Sugar and Ace are watching them from the huts and have figured out that Kelly and Paloma are off trying to plot against them. Sugar stupidly thinks that they don't have to worry about alliances forming and plotting yet. Even Sugar doesn't know why she's with Ace, telling us "for some reason, me and Ace decided we had some kind of connection." She then tells us she trusts Ace to "take care of [her] as much as he can." Right. I think the bag of sugar in my pantry is smarter than Sugar right now. At least it can look out for itself.

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