Shocking! Simply Shocking!

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B- | 1 USERS: A+
Rumblings Of Mutiny

Tijuana interviews -- not much to her substantive or grammatical credit -- that she thinks that the former Drakes work "a great deal more than what is necessary." She feels that they sometimes work just to look like they're doing something, even if it's "frivolous." I suspect that this is also true. Tijuana then, however, flies right over the cliff into indefensibility by saying that when everybody works all the time, it doesn't allow her to express herself and let her inner Tijuana run free or something of that sort. I would have been with her, you see, if she'd said, "Look, we need to cooperate on a work schedule, and Christa can't just expect to dictate to everyone what work is going to get done and when," or if she'd said, "Sometimes, they're doing work I don't think is important, and I don't feel obligated to jump in just to please Christa." When your argument against the workhorses in your tribe, however, is that they're keeping you from being fully able to inhabit your true self, you've lost me. If getting water keeps you from "being who you are," then who you are is a lazy-ass.

Lill, on the other hand, is happy as a clam with all the working, even though, as she drags a large tree up the beach, she says, "Now I know how Jesus felt." She...she does?

And now, the immunity challenge. The tribe heads for an expanse of beach where Jeff takes back the goofy-looking Supreme Cutlass from Rupert. Jeff reminds them that seven of them will be the jury and two of them will get to the final vote. Today, we are seeing the annual gang-up immunity challenge, designed to give the rest of the tribe a shot at the person they most want a chance to boot, even if that person would normally whip all their asses in an immunity challenge. This is also known as Your Chance To Get Rid Of Rupert. What will happen in the game is that Jeff will ask a series of history questions about the Pearl Islands. Every time you get one right, you get to drop a coconut in somebody else's trough. And that's not a euphemism. They all have troughs (which Jeff, by the way, somewhat hilariously refers to as "coconut holders," as if that's a standard piece of equipment), and when your trough is full (five coconuts), you're out.

Tijuana, Rupert, Christa, and Lill get the first question right. Tijuana coconuts Ryan-O. Huh? Lill also coconuts Ryan-O. Rupert coconuts Ryan-O. Christa coconuts Ryan-O. Oh, let's just follow the coconutting, because the questions are boring. Tijuana gives Ryan-O the final Coconut of Death, and he's out. Darrah coconuts Christa. Sandra coconuts Darrah in retaliation, declaring, "nobody hurts Christa." Burton coconuts a giggling Tijuana. Jon coconuts Darrah. Rupert coconuts Darrah. Ryan-O, in his final coconutting opportunity before leaving the game, coconuts Christa. Tijuana coconuts Burton. Burton coconuts Darrah, giving her four. Jon gives her the final Coconut of Death, and she's out. Rupert coconuts Tijuana. Christa coconuts Tijuana. Tijuana coconuts Burton. Burton coconuts Tijuana right back. Lill coconuts Burton, complaining that at breakfast, she talked and all Burton did was nod. Oooh, she's being all tricky. ["Lord, what a crappy liar." -- Wing Chun] Tijuana coconuts Burton. He coconuts her back with the Coconut of Death, and she's out. Jon coconuts Sandra. Lill coconuts Burton again, saying she's "still pissed about the breakfast." He laughs. "Paybacks are a bitch, Lill," he says. "And so am I," she answers. Burton, he is knocked out. Rupert coconuts Jon. Sandra coconuts Jon. Lill coconuts Jon. Rupert coconuts Lill. Christa coconuts Lill. Sandra is the first to coconut Rupert. He shakes his head, and then mutters that maybe she won't get any fish. Or any birthday cake, for that matter. Such a baby. Jon coconuts Sandra. She gives him the finger. Heh. Rupert coconuts Sandra. Sandra coconuts Jon, knocking him out. Jon coconuts Sandra, knocking her out back. Lill coconuts Rupert. Rupert coconuts Lill, and she's done. We're down to Rupert and Christa. Now it's just a race, and Christa gets knocked out first.

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