Episode Report Card
Joanna: C+ | Grade It Now!
First They Were Afraid!

Back at Kucha, we see that Debb is using her book learnin' to light a fire. Seriously, she checked a book out of the local Milan (New Hampshire) library and read up on how to light a fire, but never actually tried it herself. Hey! I think I'll go take a martial arts book out of the library, spend a few minutes reading it, and kick your ass by morning! She tells the others without a trace of irony that "the book says we needed friction." In an interview, Kimmi says that had Debb "went and practiced this stuff at home, [she] would take her a lot more seriously." Suddenly, dramatic music swells up and we enter the Rodger portion of the show. He brought along a Bible for his luxury item (though not, it appears, for the same sermonizing reasons as Dirk), and has offered it up to help with the fire-starting, which some might construe as sacrilegious, but we won't because Rodger is a cutie. Looking through the Bible, Rodger finds a letter from his son-in-law, which is all about how things on the farm will be fine without him and how everyone at home has faith in him. Kimmi reads the letter to Rodger, and there are some numbers written down which correspond to different readings in the Bible, each with a little note to Rodger. Aw. It's like a Choose Your Own Bible Adventure. Rodger talks a bit like Forrest Gump, but it's sweet. Kimmi yells, "Can he give us the page with the burning bush?" which is surprisingly funny.

Ogakor is also trying to start a fire, and Keith tells Kel and Colby that his son is a Cub Scout: "If I start this fire, I will be his hero." Jerri has it in for Keith just like Stayfree had it in for Rudy, and picks a fight with him over the placement of the fire. Her logic is that if they don't place the fire where they want it now, it will be impossible to move later on. Which might be the lamest argument I've ever heard, and Keith doesn't even laugh at her, he just politely tries to explain and she goes stomping off to pose for some new headshots in the bush. Keith uses a pretty intricate contraption to try to spark the fire, with no luck. He then tells us in a confessional that because Jerri was so put out, he tried to involve her in the group's activities "with something she brought that has importance to her" -- obviously, she brought a bongo drum. ["Sorry, I think that's an even dumber luxury item than lipstick." -- Wing Chun] Jerri manages to be, at once, completely useless and the center of attention while Keith and Amber bust their asses trying to start the fire. Jerri acts concerned through her laughter when the two practically collapse from the effort.

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