Survivor

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Sara M: B | Grade It Now!
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The Lost Art of Letter-Writing

The Villains enjoy their reward, toasting their victory with giant margaritas. Sandra drinks hers, like, immediately and asks for another. Sandra, you lush! Don't get full on margaritas, now! Your awesomeness requires protein. She interviews that she feels a little guilty that she's enjoying her husband's favorite food while he's in Afghanistan, which apparently doesn't have a Sizzler. How does Samoa have a Sizzler and not Afghanistan? Weird. The Villains chow down on salads. Parvati is thrilled to actually have a napkin to go along with her meal, and unfolds it. A small scroll rolls out. Parvati quickly hides it in her lap with no one else the wiser. She says she knew immediately that it was a clue to the immunity idol and was "crazy lucky" to be seated where it was hidden in the napkin. Since when did they hide stuff in places where only one person would be most likely to find it? Don't they usually stick the clue somewhere where everyone has an equal chance, like in the tribe's toolbox or a plate in the middle of the table?

Jerri states the obvious: the Heroes think there's an all-girl alliance on the Villains. Everyone laughs at this because it's not true, and Courtney entertains us all with her impression of Rupert, which is pretty dead-on. Parvati's impression of Rupert is also good, and she adds "I'd stake me pirate's life on it." "Yarrrggh!" Courtney says. Jerri, looking much more lifelike than she has in days now that she's had some food, interviews that there is no all-girl alliance and Li'l Russell is "running the show," so the Heroes have it completely wrong. "And it's awesome," she giggles. Um, maybe it is for Li'l Russell. I don't know how it's awesome for you, as a woman, to have an entire tribe and most likely rival alliance believing you're part of an evil all-female alliance.

Steak, potatoes, and shrimp arrive. The Villains chow down except for Parvati, who says she's full and has to go to the bathroom. She excuses herself from the table. Danielle goes with her. Parvati could not be more obviously hiding something as she walks away from the table area, but I guess her tribemates are too consumed with their steaks to notice, even though Danielle and Parvati only get like two feet away from the table before Parvati whips out her scroll and shows it to Danielle. She unrolls it, and they read that there's another idol hidden in camp. Parvati interviews that she told Danielle about the clue in order to make her more loyal to Parvati than anyone else in the game. Smart. She asks if Danielle has a pocket to hide the clue in. "Put it in my boobs," Danielle says. Well, what do you know? They do come in useful after all. The scroll fits nicely in Danielle's boobs. You could stick a library in there and no one would notice. Parvati says that she and Danielle will tell Li'l Russell about the clue on a "need-to-know basis." And right now, he doesn't need to know.

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Survivor

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