Swimming With Sharks

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B+ | 2 USERS: C
The Rupert Show Is Cancelled

When Jon and Lill return to camp, they explain to their disappointed tribemates that the fishing was unsuccessful. Given that it looked like the hooks were baited and dropped by the boat guys, and that the boat guys were apparently in charge of where to go and where to fish, if Jon and Lill didn't get bites, it would seem to me that Rupert wouldn't have done any better, so Sandra can take off that scrunchyface right now, thank you very much. Spear fishing is one thing, but if you're fishing from a boat with a line and nothing's biting, there's nothing you can do about it if you can't control where you are. The fish aren't going to jump into the boat just because Rupert catches fish for the tribe. In fact, they might hold that against him, don't you think?

Rupert explains that he pulled Lill aside immediately and tried to assure her that if she sticks with him, she can make the final two. Please. He told her just last week that she could do no better than final six, and she knows very well that he won't vote against Christa and Sandra. Too little too late, there, big guy. We see them talking in night-vision, and Rupert voices over that he was trying to figure out whether Jon was trying to suck Lill into a plot. Lill tells him Jon wasn't, and Rupert explains that he therefore now knows that Lill is "wholehearted with [him]." I think Rupert reads other people about as well as I read Sanskrit. "I wanted to hug and kiss her!" he says happily. Wow. Getting played by Lill has to be a low point in anyone's life, strategic-thinking-wise. Rupert gives her hand a smooch, and she looks very miserable. She is suffering. He is being manipulated. Heeee hee.

The next day is Day 27, and it finds the tribe catching up with Jeff for yet another challenge. Jeff takes the Supreme Cutlass from Rupert and explains the week's challenge. Basically, this week, we are exploring the wonderful and dangerous world of blowdarts. Each player has been assigned a segment of a big dartboard. The first thing you have to do is hit your own part of the board once, and that makes you what Jeff calls a "killer." Once you do that, you can start hitting other people's parts of the board. Each shot against you takes one, two, or three of your "lives," depending on where it lands. When you lose all three lives, you're done. So, like last week, there's an opportunity to take other people out.

The first shooter is Lill, who misses the target totally. Ditto Tijuana, followed by Darrah. Jon misses as well, and then Rupert (of course) hits himself and becomes a "killer." Burton does the same. Nothing much happens until Jon makes himself a killer, and then Rupert hits Darrah and takes two of her lives. Burton hits Tijuana once. Sandra becomes a killer. Christa, Lill, Tijuana, and Darrah remain completely ineffectual. Jon takes out Christa with one shot, taking all three lives. Heh. "My bad," Jon mutters, because he totally didn't mean to. Rupert hits Darrah again and knocks her out. Now, Rupert was a complete idiot, I would point out, for concentrating on Darrah, who apparently can't even get her darts to the target, let alone accurately hit the side of a freaking barn door. If he's got good aim, he should have been aiming at Burton, because Burton's the only person who can hit the target reliably besides Rupert himself. When you get somebody out of the game, they also stop shooting. Had he hit Burton, there was plenty of time to take out Darrah without having much difficulty with getting hit himself. See what I mean? Rupert is skilled, but very, very strategically weak. He thinks on a very elementary level -- "I want to vote against Darrah; Darrah must not win immunity; I must hit Darrah." To control the outcome, he needed to get Burton early. Didn't do it; has only himself to blame for what happens.

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