Swimming With Sharks

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B+ | 2 USERS: C
The Rupert Show Is Cancelled

Snake continues digesting lizard. Only hind end of lizard now visible out of snake's mouth. Snake begins to slither off with lizard.

On the beach, Rupert and Lill discuss shell collecting. "What needs to be done?" she asks, ready to pitch in -- and, perhaps, trying to get a sense of Rupert's routine in preparation for his absence. "Shell collecting," he tells her, all "don't worry your pretty little head about food or real tasks." Lill interviews that Burton and Jon keep pounding it into her head that it's a game, and that she needs to play it like a game. Lill, however, is sad that she can't play sentimentally, because she lurves Rupert and would rather keep him. Oh, yes. I understand, dear. It's all been grand, dear. But now it's time to get rid of the guy who you know will, after he has dispensed with two more people, get rid of you.

Strolling on the beach, Rupert talks to Jon and Burton about how they need to boot Tijuana and Darrah now, so that they don't win immunity challenges later and interfere. Yeah, that seems likely. Rupert interviews that although Darrah seems resigned to leaving, "that could all be an act." Fortunately, however, Rupert knows that he has at least four, because he knows he has Lill. So, worst-case scenario, if Jon and Burton team up with Tijuana and Darrah, it's a four-four split. Rupert then talks to Christa, Sandra, Burton, and Jon, and gravely insists that they knock fists that they still intend to keep the five of them together. Burton and Jon offer happy fist-knocks, because of course, you can technically still knock fists, even if you're lying. Sandra interviews that she supposes it's possible that Burton and Jon are plotting something to outmaneuver the Triumvirate, "but [she doesn't] see it happening." Her sole reason for this seems to be previous expressions of loyalty among "the strong five." She is really, really deluded. Methinks she is spending too much time with Rupert.

Snake finishes off lizard. Thus endeth the lesson.

Tribal council time. The tribe descends on the fire pit, prepared to face Jeff. The first thing on the agenda this week is bring in Ryan-O, the first member of the jury. The Eagle-Eyed Forum Posters almost uniformly thought Ryan-O looked kind of rough; I don't know, he looks okay to me. Jeff talks to the tribe about the fact that they've been out there for twenty-seven days. "Is there anyone on this tribe you couldn't survive without?" Sandra points to Rupert, of course, and explains again how they all would have died, and nobody else would have been able to get food, and it's as ridiculous a theory as it's been from the beginning. I'll give Rupert this -- he did convince at least Sandra that he was critical to her survival, which is just absurd. If he weren't there, they would have done something else. They might have had less fish, but they would have done something else. Someone else would have mastered the spear. Someone else would have learned to do better without fish. They would have lived. Sandra also manages, in this talk, to insult Burton for only bringing a stingray instead of regular fish. A stingray that, as I recall, everyone agreed was really tasty, so I don't know what's chewing on her ankles and making her all bitchfaced. "We'd be assed out if it wasn't for Rupert," she says, and I am officially tired as all hell of her. It's a shame, because I loved her at first, but she has gotten arrogant, bitchy, and incredibly judgmental as things have progressed, and now I don't like her one bit.

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