Survivor

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Suddenly Susie

As Kota does their slow-mo walk of defeat, Susie narrates that she wants to see someone from Fang go home tonight, but that all depends on whether or not she can trust Marcus to get her to the Final Three. First of all, how can Marcus get you anywhere? And second of all, have you seen this show, Susie? People promise all kinds of things to advance themselves. They rarely deliver. Marcus can promise you Final 3, Final 2, Final 1, whatever -- it doesn't mean he'll be able to do it for you, or that he'll want to.

The Kota losers return to Kamp. Marcus tells us that the immunity challenge brought them a "less than ideal result." Well, you only have yourself to blame for that. All of you on Kota do. Except for Bob. He outlasted all of you and he's fifty-seven. Crystal tries to explain away her dismal failure by saying the poles "didn't feel right." I'd say that makes sense for someone more used to those small metal relay batons, except that it's abundantly clear that Crystal has never handled such a pole, or run, in her life ever. Marcus tells us that he's sorry, but Crystal or Ken is going home tonight. Because of his connection with Crystal, he wants Ken to go.

So Marcus talks to Crystal at the dock and lays it all out, saying he wants to vote Ken out tonight, and Susie after that. I think he's being honest here, and that if everything went according to plan he would vote Susie out after Ken, since his alliance would still have the numbers with Ken gone and they'd be rid of unpredictable Susie. I also think he honestly wanted Crystal to be in the "Kota Six" and take Susie's place there. Crystal doesn't think Marcus will be able to convince the rest of his alliance to accept her over Susie, but Marcus says Corinne and Randy hate Susie, and Crystal sucks so bad at challenges that no one would consider her to be an immunity threat. Crystal laughs and admits that she is "batting zero" right now. Understatement. But what she lacks in athleticism, she makes up for in brains, as Crystal goes along with Marcus's plan but tells us that she doesn't appreciate him coming to her to vote off her number one ally. "I'm not pleased. At all," she says, adding that Marcus is playing the nice guy card but she can tell he's a schemer. Meanwhile, she's playing the nice girl card but she's also a schemer -- and a liar. "The game is outwit, outlast. You can't outwit Crystal Cox, baby," she says. And yet, the show's logo has outwitted her twice in one episode.

Marcus goes to the woods with Susie and says they should keep Crystal around since she's hopeless at any and all challenges and vote Ken out tonight. Susie suggests that Crystal might get better now that she's getting some food. Ha! Crystal sucked on a full stomach, too. Marcus doubts it: "she's atrocious!" He says he wants Ken out tonight, and Crystal out next, although he hopes it won't come down to that. Susie tells us that she "feels safer" going along with Marcus right now, even though this is probably the only opportunity she'll have in the game to get rid of him. Don't be an idiot, Susie! Susie tells Marcus she's trusting him now, and he says he thought they were trusting each other for a while now. Except when everyone accused Susie of being untrustworthy, like, yesterday. How quickly Marcus forgets. I hope Susie doesn't forget. Susie says she's trusting Marcus to bring her to the Final Three. Marcus points out that they have to help each other do that, but says he could see a Final Three of him, Charlie, and Susie. Aw, Marcus is just as devoted to Charlie as Charlie is to him! Susie tells us that she sees Marcus as her best chance of getting to the end.

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Survivor

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