Survivor

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Average Joe

After twenty minutes have elapsed, J.T. is holding himself on the pole by sheer force of will and some fingernails. Sierra is finally starting to struggle. But then, J.T.'s force of will isn't enough and he's down. Douche takes a minute to point out that the four people left in the game are all from Tempura, and Probst asks him if he's saying that Tempura is planning on sticking together against Jalapeño. Douche says they are. And it would appear that I spoke too soon about Douche not sucking out of this challenge, as he basically chooses to climb down the pole and give up because he's that confident that he doesn't need immunity. Warriors give up and quit all the time, so this makes sense. You know what also makes sense? Douche knew he was about to slip anyway and thought it would look better to "choose" to lose than to lose a physical challenge to Sierra or Debbie. Sierra is the next to go, although definitely not by choice as she slides down the pole and goes to the bench with more wood in her arm than skin. It's harsh enough that Probst almost feels sorry for her. "That post got every part of your body on the way down," Probst says. Sierra clearly wishes she had chosen to wear pants.

Thirty minutes have elapsed, and Debbie is starting to have problems. Meanwhile, Tyson is hanging on by his toes. He slides down a bit to rearrange his weight, and Erinn tells him to be careful he doesn't fall off. "Don't boss me around, lady," he says, and not in a nice or joking way. Erinn says she doesn't want him to break his "pretty little face" and Tyson agrees that this is a concern. Probst laughs and laughs. Sorry, J.T., but I think Probst has a new mancrush. And Debbie laughs so hard that she falls off the pole, handing Tyson the win. I'm still pretty impressed with her performance, I have to say. Douche gives Tyson a standing ovation and Probst makes sure to put his hand on Tyson's back and let it linger there after he presents him with the immunity necklace. With that, he tells everyone to go back to camp except Joe so the Survivor medical team can look at his bug and bacteria infested leg. J.T. gives us the post-challenge wrap-up, saying things are scary and he has to put his trust in people he barely knows. But he doesn't really have any other choice.

After the break, Joe's leg wound is inspected by Dr. Lucy McKinnon, who must have made the show sign some kind of contract forcing them to write out her name and profession if she ever appeared on screen. Dr. Lucy's prognosis is that the amount of swelling in Joe's wound probably means it's full of pus. Joe says that the only way he'll leave the game because of this wound is if they tell him he'll lose the leg if he stays. Sounds like that's exactly what Lucy's going to say, as she says that the wound is very close to the bone, so there's a risk of the bone becoming infected or Joe's blood getting infected. So he's at risk of losing his life along with the leg. Okay, how did people survive back before they invented medicine? On this show, you trip over a rock and get a tiny cut and it always swells up and almost kills you. Also, if this show wants its episodes to be exciting and not boring inevitable med-evacs, perhaps Dr. Lucy and her team could do a better job of treating the wounds when they happen and doing some adequate follow-up care instead of waiting until it's too late and the contestant has to leave the game and we're left with a boring hour of nothing despite the editors' best efforts. They can give Joe a band-aid and Neosporin and still maintain the image that these contestants are roughing it with only the bare essentials.

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Survivor

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