Day Thirty-Nine. The camp is a mess. Rich is lying in a hammock, his feet propped up on the camera, the tiny, translucent CBS logo on the heel of his foot. That's no accident, folks. Kelly and Rich are "just chillin'." Kelly is writing in her notepad (memoirs coming soon!) as Rich just keeps reassuring her that it's the last day. Kelly wanders off to a part of the island where she likes to go "do her thing." "Her thing" blessedly doesn't involve Sue. She goes to do yoga, meditate, and stretch. ["Alex Richmond told me Kelly's yoga technique is ass. I believe her." -- Wing Chun] She says she does this every day, but of course the selective editing didn't want you to know that until now. Jesus and The Devil return to make their homes on her shoulders again as she brings up her dealings with Sue yet again. Jesus gets bored and falls asleep. The Devil gets really mad and yells at her to shut up already or he'll stab her eardrum with a pitchfork, but she doesn't seem to notice.
Rich is reflecting. Even sneaky editing can't hide the fact that nothing, nothing is happening on the island. Maybe Jeff should belly dance or something, because this has just slowed to a dead crawl.
Before they go, Kelly and Rich decide to burn everything they don't need, from the spoons to the faux-wicker-whatevers, to SuperPole 2000, the pole that never hurt anybody, yet is now subjected to a fiery death. Rich and Kelly have obviously never heard of eBay. They even burn the poor, defenseless Rattana flag. Somebody at CBS's marketing and sales department is passing out right now. Kelly has apparently relocated from the island of Sappho to the Bay of Catharsis. Stuff burns. They watch. Even destruction seems boring.
Rich says he'll miss the stars and the sea. Kelly says she wants to just get through the day. Rich says he doesn't think anybody is vindictive about the vote. Rich obviously doesn't truly know the nature of a boy named Sue. Kelly says she respects Rich's honesty. As they pack up their things to head to tribal council, a basket of crabs pokes around. Kelly and Rich walk off, and I breathe a sigh of relief. The boring, morning-before festivities have officially ended. On the way, Rich reflects that he won't be sad if he loses. "But I really want the million," he says. Honest to the end.









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