The Great White Shark Hunter

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B | Grade It Now!
Okay, Three Isn't A Totally Magic Number

Tom retells the story about the one that didn't get away as the team stands around in a circle, admiring the shark carcass. (Sharcass?) Ian says good-naturedly in an interview that hey, you try to bring in food, and what happens? Some crazypants firefighter upstages your ass. You can tell Ian loves the crazypants firefighter, as do we all. That's a very cute friendship. I'm not saying I'm going to pay money to watch them make out in the rain or anything, but they're still pretty cute. Ian tells us that now, in order to compete successfully with Tom, he will have to catch a humpback whale. Heh.

The moon hangs over Koror, and the team is still busy talking about Tom. And, more specifically, about his awesomeness. Tom interviews with some regret that "the cat's out of the bag" that he's a strong player. Yeah, good job keeping that to yourself. I guess he expected to hypnotize everyone with his gray hair, because truly, I do not understand how else he expected that tricky plan to fly. They are cooking the shark over the fire, rolled up with string. Those people do not screw around in making a nice life for themselves. Tom says something-something about not being able to pretend to be less than he really is, something-something, and I'm not paying attention, because Tom is awesome, and I don't know whom he thought he was fooling, ever, anyway. The team eats shark steak, and Coby bitches in an interview about how hard it will be for him and Gregg to vote out Tom now. Yeah, you're breakin' my heart, kid. Coby's kind of like a Greek chorus, if the chorus was made up of...well, "hairdressers" is about right.

Koror, Day 17. Gregg and Jen retrieve the treemail. It appears that this challenge requires them to build a distress signal visible from a plane.

Over at Ulong, they're reading it as well, and the welcome news that, of course, only three people from Koror can participate. Man, this season feels weird. Steph's first idea is to burn their old shelter. Girlfriend does not mess around, I am telling you. Bobby Jon adds that he can destroy the stupid bathroom they built, and they can burn the remains of that. And destroy it he does. Ibrehem explains the challenge again, for no particular reason, emphasizing that they really...need the victory. Yes, that's right. Now that they're down to three, it's time to put their plan into motion. This is where they make their big move! Their plan involves fire, unsurprisingly. They work on tearing down the shelter, as inspiring TV-movie music plays. It appears that the Ulong attitude is that they can't possibly be stuck at this camp for too long, so they might as well burn shit. Good plan! Bobby Jon notes that he suspects Koror is kicking ass at this challenge, as they've kicked ass at everything else. Heh. "We're going to see if work can overtake smartness right now," he says. Oh, man. That was so cute. And so sad.

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