Survivor
The Marooning

Episode Report Card
Joanna: B+ | 1 USERS: A+
YOU GRADE IT
Quest for Fire

Each team treks onto the beach, where an elaborately constructed and ridiculously stupid obstacle course awaits them. Is Jeff Probst extremely self-important or is it just me? He makes them all touch their life on the island, the immunity idol. How very Bradys Go To Hawaii. And how'd he get away with removing it from the construction site, anyway? Each team has a raft and a bunch of torches to light. I refuse to encourage further such events by providing more details. Jeff whines, in his best "I'm serious now guys," voice, "Don't put me in the position of having to make a judgment call. I don't want to. There s too much at stake." Um, okay Jeff.

Coverage of the challenge consists of underwater shots of feet running and flailing. Snore. Halfway through, the teams are even. As they're rising up from the water to begin the beach portion of the torch lighting, Sonja wipes out and the rest of the Tagi end up dragging her dead weight. Pagong takes the lead. At one point, Jenna looks like she's about to light Greg's hair on fire. The Tagi team manages to catch up at the last minute but then they end up losing anyway. The narrator materializes and pitches his spiel once again. As we go to credits, the cameras alternate between the celebrating Pagongs and the dejected Tagi. The dramatic music rises. This goes on for a very long time. I guess they ran out of nibbling rat footage.

Tagi Day Three. Dirk prefers the company of the Lord to that of his fellow tribesmen. He ecstatically reads the Bible and gets a little too excited about it, if you ask me. Rudy says of Richard in a confessional, "He's fat, but he's good." One out of two isn't bad, Rudy. We learn that the S16 have to pack all their stuff every time a tribal council occurs. How irritating for them. Sonja is particularly chatty this morning; in a confessional, she says she feels responsible. She should. Stacey tells the camera that she feels secure about the vote, that she and Kelly and Sue have come to a "mutual decision" and that Rudy is their choice. Stacey doesn't appear to me to have made an independent decision in her life, so "mutual" is an interesting way to put it. Sue later snarks, "The chicks think I'm voting for one person and I'm not." Sue catapults herself to the position of my favorite Tagi.

As the group heads off to tribal council, Jeff Probst is waiting for them, prancing about the prehistoric set of Who Wants to be a Millionaire. Dum. Dum. Dum. He explains that There will be a vote. Someone is going home. Really, I hadn't gotten that yet.

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