The Most Deserving

Episode Report Card
Joanna: B- | Grade It Now!
R-E-F-L-E-C-T -- Take Care, TCB!

We go from the ominous track to the sad track as we see Tina writing in her diary. As she scribbles, she voice-overs that it's an "overwhelming surprise" to be there. I bet Tina writes "poetry." She says that she came into the game planning to do well, but that she never thought she could get this far, which I don't believe for a Tennessee second. She says she's "evolved" throughout the course of the game. "Evolved" is about sixteen syllables in Tina language. She tells us that she's not the same person she was when she started out, because she's "developed more" into a strategist. I bet everyone at her 20th high school reunion noticed she'd "developed more," too. She proudly points out that she's made it from the original sixteen to the final three. Suddenly we're back to Colby, who tells us that trusting people in the game will "git you gone." He goes deep and says that the game both parallels and differs from life. He says he's only been honest with himself in the game, and that he's not like that in real life. He tells us that, in trusting someone, "You're a fool for not playing the game." Does anyone think comments like these might come back to bite Colby in the ass? Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?

Tina and Colby check the treemail and discover it's arts and crafts time at Camp Convenience. There's a crate full of paints and paintbrushes. They also receive three blocks of wood and will each carve their own idol "as a gift to the land." Tina exclaims, "We git to carve it!" Well, if carving was such excitement, couldn't she have been carving all along? I'm having trouble understanding why they need to be given the wood; they're in the middle of the forest -- it's all raw materials out there. Bozo the Keith tells us that he was intimidated by the "giving back to the land" part, and that he could do an excellent job with his #42 Clown White greasepaint makeup, but it got washed away in the flood. Colby had to stop and reflect before he could see how much he took from the land. And that's before the coral episode aired and he got sued. Not only do they get paints, wood, and paintbrushes, they also get beads and feathers, too. Come. On. Are they making immunity Cher dolls? This whole thing is a travesty. Really. They're in one of the most fiercely beautiful environments in the world, and they need to cover it up with beads and feathers? Bozo the Keith tells us that painting the idols gave them closure. In a sun-lit and blurred Playboy-esque interview, Tina says she likes long walks on the beach and disco dancing. No -- really, she says she's proud to be the only woman and thus "wanted her idol to be feminine in her own way." So she gave it breast implants. Colby tells us he's been reflecting and thinking about the last forty days. Do you think there's reflecting and thinking going on? Because I'm really not sure. He says he struggled with designing his Outback Ken doll until he realized there weren't any rules to follow. He concludes that playing the game is like that too.

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