Survivor

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Off To A Bad Start

Probst explains the challenge: it's an obstacle course where each section must be completed by a different team member. The first leg is a swim out to fetch a key and then give it to the "strong person," who will use it to release two heavy log bundles. He must then carry the bundles to the agile person and set them down in front of a balance beam so that she can climb them and get on the beam. The agile person must cross the beam while threading another key through a rope wound around the beam. She then gives that key to the smart person at the end of the beam, who will use it to unlock a bag full of puzzle pieces and assemble a statue with them. The first team with an assembled statue wins flint.

The participating tribe members strip down to their underwear, which is bad news when it comes to Li'l Russell. I do not want to see that. I'm also not sure why I'm seeing it, since it's not like carrying a log bundle is something that you can do better without pants on. Swimming, however, is something you can do better without pants, but John has decided to keep his jeans on. Obviously he wears Bad Idea Jeans. Probst calls go, and Jaison and John are off. Mick is very happy to see that Jaison is a much faster swimmer than John. Jeffrey Tambor interviews that he was very surprised that Jaison was such a good swimmer, since "Afro-Americans aren't known to be uh swimmas, you know?" Even if you think that, you really shouldn't say it. Especially not on national television. Also, why does it say his name is Mike and he's a private chef when he's clearly Jeffrey Tambor? Jaison gets back with the key first and hands it to Li'l Russell, who sprints to the log bundles. Meanwhile, John is having trouble running up the beach with his jeans full of thirty extra pounds of water. We hear from the guy I think I know about this, and his name is Dave! It's totally Dave Ball! I know Dave Ball because he used to hang out at an improv theater where I was the house manager, and he always rode his bike there and then I had to go outside by myself at night through the crack dealer alley to unlock a door for him so he could store the bike inside safely even though everyone else who rode bikes locked them up outside. Not Dave Ball, though. His bike was more important than everyone else's, and so he had to make my life difficult. He was a generally nice guy aside from that, though. A little creepy. Apparently he's a fitness instructor now? And his CBS site bio calls him "Danger" Dave Ball. We never called him that. Nor did we see him as a "rock and roll rebel," whatever that is. Anyway, he is not happy with John's swimming performance and wants to vote him off for it.

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Survivor

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