Another week, another chance to vote Douche out, and another missed freaking opportunity. Debbie almost wins a place in my heart by rallying for a Douche boot from the beginning while Douche is furious that Taj and Erinn dared not to vote Sierra out last night and mutters about them being cowards. Because voting for Stephen or Debbie is cowardly while voting with the majority against Sierra is really brave. Then it's time for the auction reward, which Probst is so bored with that he only puts four items up for bid, the last one being a phone that makes this a dual-action auction/family reward challenge. Everyone gives Taj the chance to see her family over the phone, and then Probst gives her a choice: she can either hang out with her husband Football Player Eddie George at Camp Forza, or she can hang out with him at Exile and everyone else gets to see his loved one back at camp. She chooses to go to Exile, of course, and Football Player Eddie George finds his wife to be sexy, skinny, and smelly. Back at camp, Stephen sees his brother, J.T. sees his little sister, Erinn sees her dad, Debbie sees her husband, and Douche sees … his nameless assistant coach. This would be sad if I didn't hate Douche so very much. There is much crying, and then it's over to the immunity challenge, an obstacle course/memory/math skills test that Stephen wins despite sucking out at the physical aspect of the challenge. Back at camp, J.T. and Stephen are still very much in control of the game, as everyone else is too stupid or too blindly loyal to try to assemble the other four against them. At Tribal, there is much making fun of Douche from the jury and Probst, but he only gets one vote from Debbie, who is voted out by everyone except the alliancemate she turned against.
After yet another Tribal Council that didn't end in Douche being voted out, the tribe returns to camp. Stephen congratulates everyone on making it to the Final Six, and J.T. says he's happy "the drama's gone" because he doesn't understand how this show works. Douche stays quiet until he gets in front of a camera, where he interviews that Erinn and Taj "took the cowardly way out" by voting for Debbie and Stephen, neither of whom "deserve" to be voted out. I'll agree with him there, but only because there's one person who deserves to be voted out and that's Douche, and his deserving of said votes is based solely on how much I hate him and want him off my TV screen. Douche runs over to Debbie and says that Erinn and Taj "need to be cut off at the kneecaps" and his stupid non-existent Warrior Alliance needs to step up and take some swift and decisive action. "There's a reason why we have the name," Douche says, forgetting that he's the one who gave them that name and also the only person who calls them that. Douche interviews that "people who don't play this game even half as honestly as me, even half as bold as me ... pisses me off." I'm not sure what he's even talking about, since how were Erinn and Taj's votes not honest or bold? If anything, their votes were more honest than anyone else's, since they refused to vote for Sierra because they knew she was telling the truth. "I have two words for you: Taj and Erinn," Douche says to Debbie, managing to play not honestly right there since he said he was going to use two words and actually used three. He wants to "run them through with a sword," presumably after said sword cuts them off at the kneecaps. He wants Taj out next. Debbie gently urges Douche to "let it go or it's gonna drive you nuts," adorably implying that Douche isn't nuts already. But Douche does not let it go, of course, so Debbie gets fed up and walks away. She then interviews that Douche can't let anything go and it's getting really old. No shit, Debs. Don't you try to win me over with your anti-Douche talk now after aligning with him for the last ten episodes. You might be forgetful enough not to remember simple conversations with Sierra that took place the day before, but I remember all, and I hold grudges. Debbie runs to the shelter to let everyone know that Douche is very upset with how the vote went because she might be a flake, but she's still with it enough to know that it's between her and Douche for who's going home next, and she wants to make sure it'll be him. Meanwhile, the blissfully unaware Douche sits around muttering "cowards, cowards, cowards all around me" to himself like the crazy guy I saw on the street the other day. Douche interviews that he doesn't care about the million dollars -- he cares about changing this game and playing with integrity, which is kind of sad since that million dollars is the only thing on that list he's capable of achieving at this point.