J.T. and Stephen head over to fill up the water jug. They talk about their plans tonight and hope whatever move they're about to make is the right one. J.T. says he trusts Stephen one hundred percent and that Stephen trusts him just as much, which has got to be leading up to the horrible inevitable blow-out between them whenever Stephen decides to make his move against J.T. "Right now, we have played an awesome game," Stephen pats himself on the back once again. And also once again, I have to point out that their success on this season has much more to do with their opponents being morons than them being master strategists. That said, I do think Stephen is really good at this. But we'll never know how good, since he's playing with idiots that anyone with half a brain could outsmart. Stephen notes that no one wants to vote them out. J.T. agrees, but has no idea why people haven't wised up to them yet. Stephen says everyone is working hard to get on their good side rather than trying to get a group together that could overthrow them. Stephen interviews that as long as their alliance remains strong, they'll just continue to pick their opponents off one-by-one. Well, that should make for a very exciting FOUR HOURS OF SHOW next week.
And then we head to Tribal Council. Douche does some stupid dance around his torch and then the jury is called in. They're all wearing Douche feathers in their hair and have their coats draped over their right shoulders. Erinn cracks up, because she gets the joke. Douche probably doesn't. If he does, then he doesn't think it's a joke but an ode to his awesome warriorness. Either way, this might be the first time a jury has so blatantly made fun of a contestant. It probably shouldn't be allowed, but obviously the people who make the rules hate Douche as much as the rest of us. Probst starts right in on Douche, asking him who among the five contestants he considers to be the best players he wants to go to the end with. Douche launches into an explanation of how he defines a warrior. Instead of just saying "someone who I think is in my personal alliance. Antonym: cancer, defined as someone who is against me." Douche says that Stephen has gone from "a boy who likes to read books about adventure" to a man who lives it. If you like to read books about adventure, why not consider the (self-published) book some guy wrote based on Douche's supposed journals of his kayaking adventure that he found lying in some Amazon riverbank or something. Speaking of the Amazon, it's available at Amazon.com right now! Only $17.05. The book's own author rated it five stars, so you know it has to be good.