Survivor
They're Back!

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Miss Alli: A | Grade It Now!
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Tina Tumbles

Because Chapera crossed first, they get to light the Burning Man sculpture thing on fire, and it makes me laugh way too hard that news of this makes Boston Rob do his "stir the pot" dance while Sue Hawk wiggles happily behind him. Not quite the tableau one might have expected, the ecstatic celebrating of Sue and Rob. They light the large sculpture of Flame Man. They dance around him.

DUM! DUM! DUM DUM DUM DUM! The music on this show is always so intense.

We return from commercials to watch happy Chapera walk along their beach, still reliving their triumph. "The reason we won that, we played as a team," Boston Rob offers, and they all agree. He points out that even though they've had their issues at camp, they put it all aside and made the challenge work. "We're the biggest bunch-a misfit survivors you can put together from seven seasons," he interviews, and...there's a sense in which it's true. There are certainly no shiny iconic contestants like Ethan (ick) or Hatch (bleh) or Colby (meh) ["Watch it" -- Wing Chun] or Jenna Morasca (barf). Boston Rob says that nobody expects them to be successful, so it's kind of cool that they were. They continue basking in their glory as Amber points out that they won the very first challenge on the very first all-star edition of the very first reality show on the very first television network of the very first planet in the very first...well, you get the idea. Boston Rob points out that they came back with a positive attitude, but what they really need, still, first, last, and always, is fire, so that they can get some water in them.

Saboga. Day 3. Many unhappy people are looking around. Jenna L. says that it's "horrible" being the first ones who have to go to tribal council. Then she says "horrible" again, in case you missed it the first time. She and Jerri sit around with Rupert and Rudy. She tells Rupert frankly that she thinks it's best to get rid of the two winners first. "I don't want to see them get another million dollars," she says. Jerri says with some guilt that she's sort of looking forward to it if they can actually boot a winner, because the winners have never learned what losing is like. Rupert is noncommittal. Jenna interviews that she's still not sure she knows what Rupert is going to do. "He could be playing a bigger game than I think," she says. "You can't take anything anyone says for what it means," she adds, and that isn't quite what she meant to say, but I'll give it a pass. Because next, we see her talking to Ethan. Smug, annoying Ethan, that is. "You're a very strong member of the tribe," she says to him matter-of-factly, "but you're also a winner, Ethan." He tries to convince her that this is an advantage -- that she should take him to the final two because no one would vote for him.

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Survivor

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