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Miss Alli: A | Grade It Now!
Tina Tumbles

As if you didn't know what a dink Ethan is yet, he calls Rupert "Ruprecht," which means he wasn't even watching S7 before they left to come down here, which is a pretty good indicator of laurel-resting. Are you really surprised? ["Do we know for sure that the seventh season had started airing before they started filming the eighth, though? I thought it hadn't." -- Wing Chun] Rupert quietly interviews that he's "the new guy," and that he doesn't know the rest of these people, whereas they all do know each other. He says that his current plan is to "stand back and let all these egos decide what we do." Heh. Now, see? If he had been this wise about his own season, he might very well have won. If he remains non-blustery and non-entitled for an entire season, he might change my view of him entirely. (I will admit it is not likely.) He acknowledges in an interview that this is a new strategy for him. Yeah, no kidding. Bullying didn't turn out as well as he expected, I guess. Jenna L., meanwhile, happily points out to Rupert some highly unripe bananas that are up in a tree. She interviews that when she saw the people in her tribe on the boat, she was ecstatic. She sees Jerri and Rupert as good allies for her, and Rudy as a good one as well. She thinks it will be easy to convince them to get rid of Tina and Ethan. Yep. That's certainly what I'd do. Provide two obvious boots, you save yourself for potentially several rounds. ["That's exactly why I thought past winners shouldn't be included in this thing: they're most likely to get picked off first because they've already won once, so that's boring." -- Wing Chun]

Jerri has a different problem. She's not too crazy about having been put on a tribe with Tina, a woman already known not to like her. "I'm going to try this new strategy of mine," she says, "and that's to keep my damn mouth shut." Wow, reality TV really is educational. Saboga makes it to their water well, and Rudy starts drinking it right away, until they stop him and tell him it needs to be boiled. Jerri stresses in an interview that there are "brain parasites that will put you in a coma." There are way too many jokes there. Just way, way too many. I am overwhelmed. In an interview, however, Rudy says that he's had bad water all over the world, and that he doesn't think this is going to be any worse. I kind of dig what I read as an "I'm seventy-six years old; if I go, I go" attitude. I like the idea of saying to bacteria, "Oh, what are you going to do to me?"

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