Survivor
Thy Name Is Duplicity

Episode Report Card
Joanna: B | Grade It Now!
YOU GRADE IT
So That's Where He Gets It From...

As the S9 ladies load up the raft, Jenna tells us that her strategy is to get the women's vote. She squeakily tells Kelly and Sue they can vote her off because she's excited she made it this far and Sue replies, "There ain't no girls going for a while, you guys." Sue tells us in an extreme close-up that the woman are all workers and adds, "I thought [Jenna] would drive me wild but she doesn't, so...." The next doll I pitch to CBS will be Sex Talk Sue, who misappropriates various sexual metaphors and comments. I can just see it on the shelf at Spencer Gifts. Shit and Speak Sean is next on the list and he says things like, "So I just had my first bowel movement," and "I am now one of the bowel movers!" when his string is pulled. Sue tells Jenna and Kelly that the "guys' days are numbered," and Jenna high-fives Sue, thinking she's made a friend and not just bought the Brooklyn Bridge. Sue, Kelly and Jenna then catch a crab, which causes them to shriek and laugh, and Sue makes the loudest noise, like a hog call or something. Jenna tells us the girls are carrying the weight of the team. But they still can't figure out how to kill a crab. Kelly yells, "Get 'em. Get 'em, Sue. Beat 'em with the shoe." And then she tells us, "We beat the hell out of the crab with the shoe," and I wonder under which context this merits repeating. In a confessional, Sue says she thinks there's a chance the women would want to form an alliance after a few men have been voted off, and if that happens, "I'll just lead on with them like 'Yeah, that's a good idea,' but, as far as the women forming an alliance or making one, no, it ain't gonna happen. I already got mine. I like mine."

The camp resembles a Pottery Barn catalogue at this point, with lots of woodsy bowls and benches and stuff. Maybe they'll come up with the Survivor series of coffee and end tables. As we see shots of various Rattana members construed to look like they're starving and dying (all we really need is Colleen to advance the wasting-away premise), Kelly tells us that Rich is still the only one who catches fish, and meanwhile, the rice is running out. As Colleen squats on her haunches, she looks like one of those award-winning starving Ethiopian photos from the mid-1980s. Sue yells at Talking Rudy Doll for putting both bowls on the fire and says, "You don't have to be stingy." As Greg looks on, amazed at the oddity of the former Tagi tribe, Talking Rudy Doll says, "I ain't above eatin'." When Talking Rudy Doll says a good line, he knows he said a good line and cracks himself up. Talking Rudy Doll's string is pulled and he repeats the exact same phrase he used last week about everything getting smaller. Sue and Talking Rudy Doll calculate that the current rice supply will last two days. Sue tells us that she wishes some of the other people would start conserving a little more as we see shots of Gervase and Colleen shoveling bowl after bowl into their obviously overfed bodies. Sue says "people that are being pigs" should eat less, so there's more for her at the end.

Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8Next

Survivor

Comments

SHARE THE SNARK

X

Get the most of your experience.
Share the Snark!

See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

Share your activity with your friends to Facebook's News Feed, Timeline and Ticker.

Stay in Control: Delete any item from your activity that you choose not to share.

The Latest Activity On TwOP