Survivor

Episode Report Card
Sara M: B | 900 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
Ash Wednesday

Grant gets his first section completed first and runs to the second bag station, where he must connect four S-hooks to each other and use them to lift his bag and carry it back to the mat. Somehow, Phillip is in the second place and then takes the lead when he gets his hooks together and the bag attached to them before anyone else. He's so excited about it, though, that he manages to drop the bag and all his hooks come apart before he can get back to the mat. Even so, he's able to put it all back together and bring his second bag to the mat first, with Rob just behind him. Suddenly, Ashley finishes her first section and puts her hooks together and gets her second bag on the mat only a little bit behind Phillip and Rob. Grant has fallen behind significantly, and Natalie can't figure out the puzzle. "Natalie still inexplicably working on her first section!" Probst says cruelly. He then cheers for Rob and says he's making "quick work" of his second section. Working even quicker, though, is Ashley. She finishes first, but Grant is right behind her, having somehow caught up and passed Rob and Phillip. Phillip and finally Rob finish their second sections, while Probst makes sure to point out again that Natalie sucks at life and is still on the first section.

Ashley puts the last five hooks together and makes her way back to the mat with her last bag. Probst gives her faint praise before turning back to Natalie and telling her she has no chance to win at this point, so she might as well "sit back and watch." Oh, fuck you, Probst. I don't like Natalie that much either, but you're just being unnecessarily mean. Phillip and then Rob make it back to the mat with their last bags, but Ashley has a good lead on them. Rob tries to catch up to her, but she manages to get all of her rib pieces in. But she does not win. "Two pieces are touching!" Prost cries, refusing to declare her the winner. Rob keeps working. Ashley fixes her pieces so that none of them are touching, and Probst is forced to declare her the winner over his precious Rob. HA! Also: hooray! Something unexpected totally just happened! For like the first time this season since Ralph found the idol instead of Li'l Russell! The rest of the tribe is clearly furious over her victory, so if she didn't think she was in danger before, she must believe it now. Indeed, she says this is "such a huge relief." Not only that, Probst says, handing her a "room service" menu, but she also gets to enjoy a big meal and pick one other person to share in the reward with her. Of course, she picks Natalie. You know Phillip is so pissed off right now, what with men needing those extra calories and all.

Survivor

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