Survivor
Trial By Fire

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Joanna: B+ | Grade It Now!
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Well, hello there, Mr. Goodbar
Sandwiches are beautiful,
Sandwiches are fine.
I like sandwiches,
I eat them all the time.
I eat them for my breakfast
And I eat them for my lunch.
If I had a million sandwiches
I'd eat them all at once.
Once I met an old man.
He had a loaf of bread.
He saw that I had tuna fish
And this is what he said,
'You're tuna fish looks lonely
And my slice of bread is bare,
We could have some sandwiches
If you would care to share.'
So I said, sandwiches are beautiful,
Sandwiches are fine¼.

And it goes on. And yes I said "my husband." And no we don't have a child. He just likes his sandwiches, okay? Lamber announces that it's a "huge amount of food" to Tina, which seems like an assumption. That Lamber, going around making asses out of you and me. In relaying the clue, Jerri seems most excited about the "losers get[ting] none" part. Tina tells Lamber and Jerri that she's not afraid of the dark, and then tacks on "sister" in a failed attempt to sound hip. She should really just embrace her soccer mom-dom.

At Kucha, Elisabeth and Alicia hug each other because they're afraid of the dark. Nick attempts to interpret the clue by reciting it back to us word for word. He accurately determines that "one person will be leading the tribe through the dark." Kucha then practices. They actually practice. They blindfold themselves in a little conga line while Nick runs backwards in front of them and coaches them. Ogakor continues to just stand around talking about the clue. Over at Kucha, they're now walking around with their eyes closed and their arms out in front of them like B-movie zombies. Meanwhile, Jerri leads Ogakor, including Keith, in recreational yoga. It's a nice little montage of Kucha readying themselves while Ogakor does sun salutations. See what the editors are doing here? Jerri tells us it will suck if Kucha wins the reward and that she thinks "it would be really nice of them if they threw this one for us." But we all know they don't deserve to win the game because while they're busy downward dogging, Kucha is the team with heart. Got it?

Oh! That same baby alligator fell off that same log! Again! Will he never learn?

The teams arrive at the challenge and Peachy asks them "How goes it?" trying to sound all tribal. He then gives each team one of those Dureet Toes things Tina loves so much and they squeal and pass it around like it's made of gold. They also get a sip of Mountain Dew in a little cup, and Jerri yells, "Do the Dew, man!" hoping she'll steal the contract from Road Rules. Each team picks a leader as a set of eyes while the remainder of their team is blindfolded coached through a series of obstacles. Jerri and Nick are the eyes and they sit on "elevated perches" which are the lifeguard stands that were used in the first tower of fire challenge. The first challenge is to place a log on a sawhorse; the next is to switch a trap on land with a trap in the water. The S11 must fill buckets from a "water tower" and dump the water into a wine barrel. When the wine barrel overflows, the final task is to pick up a picnic basket and place it on a picnic table. Although it's not made clear, it appears that the blindfolded competitors don't see or hear about the tasks before being blindfolded. Rodger sits out again, presumably to even out the numbers. Peachy starts the contest and chaos follows -- it's very difficult to follow the hows and whys of which team is winning. Jerri gives her team very useful hand signals, leading Lamber and Keith to get stuck in a bush. Nick favors yelling, "There you go! There you go! There you go!" to his team and that "there's a trap!" At first I think he means a trap as in a trick, and probably his teammates did too. But then we all realize it's a fishing trap and sigh in relief. Jerri yells to her team that "there's a trap on the table," which would be a fabulous clue if only they knew there was a table. Oh, and where it was. Ogakor's trap gets stuck around the table leg and Jerri yells some more useless clues to Colby to release it. She then yells, "You're gonna go in the water," when they're not even near the water, but when Kucha is near the water. Jerri's not terribly bad at this, but she's not good either. Nick's not much better -- they're like nightmare coxswains. Michael and Elisabeth cling to each other's hands and seem to really trust each other.

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