Episode Report Card
admin: B+ | 2 USERS: A
The Biggest Chicken
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

Hey, do you guys think there will ever be a "previously on" segment that doesn't mention Kelly B.'s artificial leg? It's gotten more camera time and attention than that other Kelly's entire body. Anyway, Espada is back at camp after getting rid of Jimmy T. Holly interviews that she had "no idea" Jimmy T. was going to get voted out and was "shocked" when he left. Damn, she is clueless. I love it. She stupidly insists to two of the people who just voted Jimmy T. out that he was a good guy. Holly continues that everyone told her they were voting for "the weakest link," who she understood to be Dan. She doesn't see how the weakest link could have been Jimmy T. "Something has to change," she says. Why, it's almost like she knows that that's exactly what's going to happen!

The next morning, spirits at Espada may seem low, but Marty interviews that he's thrilled to bits that Jimmy T. is gone and his control of Espada is assured. He tells Dan that they're "good" for at least two or three more Tribal Councils. He says he's thinking "two Tribals ahead" in this game and with a high degree of certainty, so I'm sure everything is going to unfold exactly as he plans. "I can't imagine anything going wrong," he tells Dan. "It's done. It's locked." Dan is also feeling a bit feisty today, saying he's ready to vote Jane and Holly out, since they voted for him last night. Actually, he said they "signed their own death certificate," which is a little different. It could mean voting them out, but it could also mean putting a hit on them after the game. Or both. "Holly next," Marty says. And then, just to make what's about to happen next all the more satisfying for the viewers at home, he says something "extraordinary, off-the-charts, completely whacked out" would have to happen to ruin his evil plans. And let's not forget La Flor's too-confident villain NaOnka, who is similarly gleeful about her position in this game and her alliance's control over it. NaOnka says that with the new tarp on the shelter, things are pretty comfortable. She even managed to do her hair somehow. And she reminds us that she has that immunity idol, and thus that God cannot possibly exist.

With that, it's time for a reward challenge! Yes, just a reward challenge! Hooray for no more combo challenges! La Flor is duly shocked to see Jimmy T. gone, and Brenda says Marty is looking "rough," possibly because she thinks there's a women's alliance in control at Espada. And now comes one of Probst's favorite hosting moments: when he gets to shatter the contestants he hates' dreams of victory by announcing a tribe switch. There are gasps all around. "I'm gonna cry right now," the other Kelly says, like anyone cares what she thinks or even knows who she is. Probst asks Marty how he feels about this, and Marty admits that he was "not counting on this" because he apparently never watched this show before. I mean, I know they haven't done a tribe switch in a few seasons, but come on. Jud says this is disappointing, because his tribe was doing so well. Also because he might have to go to Espada, and his tiny brain cannot handle learning a new tribe name.

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