United We Stand, Divided We…?

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B- | Grade It Now!
Strangers In A Train Wreck

Camp of the Damned. A crab crawls out of a sneaker, like, "I ain't hangin' around with these losers, dude." The sad Morgan tribe approaches the camp, walking along the beach. Andrew says that with the other immunity challenges, he couldn't help sitting around thinking about what they could have done differently. This time, he feels confident that there's nothing that they could have done. And he finds that comforting or something, I guess. He sucks up to Osten about how awesome he was and how long he held Darrah up. Osten interviews that "the weight of the world was on [his] shoulders for a day," and he didn't get it done. Hey, baby, you said it, not me. He claims that he was in bad shape, so "it was just a matter of time."

Tijuana interviews that going to tribal council yet again is "disheartening." Thank you, Tijuana, queen of understatement. "It's one of us, and I don't want it to be me," she says insightfully. Preparing for the boot, Osten, Andrew, and Tijuana have a little discussion about Lill. Tijuana is inclined to admire Lill's work ethic around camp. She doesn't say, "Hell, it's better than mine," though she could. Andrew asks, however, whether Lill does anything around camp that Darrah couldn't do. Which is asinine, of course, because it's not a matter of what you could theoretically do -- it's a matter of what you actually do. Furthermore, I would bet that Lill can do a lot of things that Darrah couldn't do. Like spell "Mississippi." Osten, however, agrees with Andrew, blowing off Lill's efforts around camp. "Who can't do a fire? Who can't go get water?" America: "Well...YOU, probably." Andrew interviews that he, Ryan-O, Tijuana, and Osten have "an alliance." Big shocker. Sickeningly, he calls them "Rhino, OT, T, and myself." Okay, first of all, the "myself" is unnecessary, you windbag. Second of all, I think you have enough time out here on the islands to use people's names, and I don't think if you're going to call the girl in your alliance "T," you could theoretically be creative enough not to call one of the guys "OT." Osten, for instance, could be called "Big Whiny Baby," or "Quitter," or "Albatross." All of which wouldn't be so easily confused with "T." I'm just saying. Andrew explains that the four of them obviously aren't getting booted, so it's between Darrah and Lill.

In a rather conspicuous moment of irony, Andrew, Osten, and Tijuana now have a conversation about other people's "raw intelligence." HA HA HA HA HA HA...okay, I'm done. Andrew then earns himself a place on the genuine hate list by suggesting that they discuss Lill and Darrah's respective "ability to think outside the box." Oh, Andrew. 1996 called, and it wants its trite, soulless, corporate motivational pabulum back. At any rate, Andrew thinks that Darrah's thinking remains firmly inside the box. I remain unconvinced that Darrah even knows where the box is.

Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17Next





Get the most of your experience.
Share the Snark!

See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

Share your activity with your friends to Facebook's News Feed, Timeline and Ticker.

Stay in Control: Delete any item from your activity that you choose not to share.

The Latest Activity On TwOP