Why Would You Trust Me?

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Miss Alli: A | Grade It Now!
Flip! Flip! Flip! He's A Flipper!

Remarkably, Nate chooses this moment -- in which he has been called out as part of a small group specializing in doing nothing -- for a "shut up, fool" interview in which he openly resents Jonathan treating the rest of Raro like they're "knuckleheads." Wow. I mean, the only way in which they're not knuckleheads is that knuckles present an image of substantially more force and power than I'm seeing in these Jack Johnson-listening dorks. (I was just guessing; I went and looked it up, and Parvati actually likes The Fray, so I apologize for suggesting the Raros aren't bad-ass.) Candice still can't use the flint to get a fire started, which is an interesting development almost four weeks into her wilderness experience. Jonathan repeats in an interview that they need to be on top of things so that they can start winning some challenges: "I'm not going to lose because you kids can't get your asses out of bed." He watches as Parvati and Nate take some leisure time to do yoga. I think Jonathan thinks they need a little less Downward Dog and a little more ass-kicking.

Credits. Oh, I miss Flicka's long socks already, don't you? I think she would have body-checked Candice at some point, and I think I would have enjoyed that.

When we return, it is Day 25 at Happy Happy Aitu. Only at the moment, it is Day 25 at Sore Sore Aitu. Yul sits down like a creaky old man, and then admits to Ozzy that he's generally "tired and achy," and that one of his legs is hurting. Sundra tells Yul to drink a lot of water. That's her answer for everything, I suspect, including malaria. ["Ha! Mine too. If a physical ailment isn't dehydration-related, I usually chalk it up to pinkeye." -- Wing Chun] Yul tells us that the members of Aitu have all been having to compete in every challenge back to back, and that it's really beginning to take a toll. Ozzy, adorably, is utterly grossed out by a giant scrape on Sundra's leg that's...molting, or something. It's like part of her leg is abandoning ship. She interviews that their little tribe is still a pack of underdogs at this point, and that she thinks they still have to prove themselves over and over. She chuckles that while it may not be a great scenario, it's kind of their only choice.

We retire to a beach, where Jeff welcomes the tribes onto their mats. Aitu learns about the double boot that took both Rebecca and Jenny. "Two?" Yul says disbelievingly, just like he's an extra in a movie who has just heard shocking news and must repeat it for the benefit of the audience. Jeff points out to Aitu that they're really lucky they won the last challenge, or they'd be down to two. Boy, I'm so happy that didn't happen. Wow. It would have been, like, the Candice and Adam Smoochie-Woochie Show forever. I kind of need a vial of smelling salts just thinking about it. Asked for her thoughts, Sundra is cautious, saying that they're evening up, but that it's not like anybody can "get comfortable." Jeff now announces why they're all there: paint, blank flag, new buffs -- that's right, they're merging. One tribe, one battle between good and evil, and I think you know who's good and who's evil. The contestants all drop their buffs, and Adam interviews that his group (playing the part of Evil in tonight's pageant) was very glad that the merge came when it did, while they were still in the majority: "The future's looking bright." Jeff hands out the new buffs, and Sundra interviews that her team is still down 5-4, and that they've got a lot of work to do.

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