Lex, Kelly, and Tom stand around at Sambutwo and gloat over how good things look for their future. Lex thinks the only thing standing between the three of them and the Final Four is immunity challenges. He says that they've "pretty much locked it." Kelly resembles Julia Stiles as she does a poor version of the White Man's Overbite. I haven't seen Save the Last Dance, but word around town is that Ms. Stiles should stick to acting. And barely that. Tom completely shows up Kelly with a most excellent Cabbage Patch. As an African wails in the background, Brandon tells us in a confessional that he doesn't want to be with his tribe anymore because it's horrible. He says "horrible" several times, so I guess the situation really is horrible. Or, Brandon's a drama queen. He tells us -- while wearing a buff that looks like a turban -- that he looks forward to the merge because in the individual competitions, "it's everybody for themselves." Didn't Samburu sit his skinny ass out every chance they got? Lex meanwhile tells Tom and Kelly that he's "stoked" because it's a whole new game. Tom points out that they should merge today, and they all agree that they hope the merge will happen.
At camp, Lex hacks at something with a machete-like knife. He tells Tom that he's "making [him] a little present," and deems it an "über-spoon." ["Shout-out." -- Wing Chun] He then questions whether Tom knows the definition of "über," and explains that it means "the ultimate." Except he sounds it out phonetically, like "UL-TI-MATE," as though Tom's some kind of moron, which he probably is, but that's beside the point. We know what über is here at MightyBigTV...it's us! In any case, Lex brags that he found a piece of wood that was "ergonomically and functionally perfect," which is a pretty heavy burden for a soon-to-be-spoon to bear. He shows the Über-Spoon (coming soon to an infomercial near you, along with Super-Pole 2000) to Kelly and Tom and names it "The Big Tom Buchanan Spoon." Kelly tells us in a confessional that Lex is "so politicking for a win," and she's irritated by watching him kiss ass and "talk in his dad voice." We see yet another clip of Lex and the Über-Spoon in which Kelly does a less than convincing job of seeming impressed. Back in her confessional, Kelly asks, "Am I the only one who notices he's a totally weird person?" ["No. Lex stalks me through my nightmares. He seriously gives me the creeps really, really bad." -- Wing Chun] Kelly's funny when she's not cheering. Actually, she's funny when she's cheering too, but in a different sort of way. She then fast-talks that she'd vote Lex off if she were sure there wasn't a forthcoming merger. Lex continues to be absurdly jazzed about his spoon, and tells Kelly he might even take it home with him. She responds, "That's great." Well, her mouth says, "That's great," but her expression says, "Shut up."