Survivor

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Sara M: B | Grade It Now!
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You know who is special, though? Phillip. But amazingly, even though we're back at Camp Onomatopoeia, we aren't watching him but Matt and Andrea, who are bonding over the fact that they are young, blonde, and pretty. Also, Matt can't stop talking about Jesus and how awesome it is that he put him on this show and in a really strong alliance. Andrea agrees. I think it's really cool that Jesus took some time out of his busy schedule to work this game for his followers, but even Jesus can't manufacture this show as well as the producers, who will never, ever let a bunch of boring Jesus freaks take time away from their precious Li'l Russell and Rob. Sure enough, Rob notices Matt and Andrea's developing bond and says he thinks Andrea is trying to lure Matt in to be her "little puppydog" and that isn't good for Rob, because he knows how dangerous a tight pair can be. I like how they don't put an occupation next to Rob's name, by the way. Because if they did, it would have to be "professional reality show contestant" at this point, no? Rob talks to some other girl in his alliance about Matt and Andrea, and she agrees that they could be trouble for the rest of them. Rob says that he likes this other girl, named Natalie, and intends to take her with him to the end because he seems to think he can beat her. He says he thinks the next person they should vote out is either Phillip or Andrea. "Sounds good," Natalie says, since she probably doesn't have an opinion of her own anyway and figures that it's in her best interests to stick with Rob and let him make the big moves.

Both tribes arrive for the reward/immunity challenge, as this season, there will only be one challenge and then the Redemption Island thing. Which is yet another reason why I hate Redemption Island. Zapato sees that Francesca was voted out of Onomatopoeia and are stunned, as everyone knows you never vote the black contestant out first because then you look racist. They also might be shocked because Francesca is awesome and therefore should still be in this game. Probst takes the immunity idol from Ralph, who promises they'll get it back soon, much to Probst and Rob's annoyance. Probst doesn't appreciate Ralph trying to angle himself as the kooky player this season, so he immediately turns to Phillip to show Ralph his competition in that category, asking him if it fires him up when his opponent says cocky things like that. "It brings out the ANIMAL in me!" Phillip says; "I will outlast ANY MAN over there!" Probst can't resist asking Phillip if he can outlast any woman. "That's another day; we'll see," Phillip says very seriously. I love you, Phillip. I'm pretty sure you're faking this whole thing, but that's okay. You are A+ entertainment for me.

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Survivor

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