Survivor

Episode Report Card
Sara M: D | 1 USERS: F
YOU GRADE IT
Nothing Left To Suck

Probst asks Ben for his opinion on everything. Ben says he knows that you never get anywhere by quitting and it's frustrating to have to "listen" to "these two girls" (which they are -- they are not women. They are children.) claim that they can't stay in this game when they are both "obviously" very capable of doing so. Does Ben realize that the other Kelly and NaOnka are going to be on jury? Or does he just not care? Because he should probably be kissing some soon-to-be-juror ass right now. Probst brings up the fact that Jud is only one year older than the other Kelly, and asks if it's her age that's making her into a big baby loser quitter. Jud says no, seeing as how he has every intention of staying in the game as long as he can. He says it's about "willpower" and mental strength. He doesn't care how bad the weather gets, he says, he knows what he's capable of and he knows he can make it through this.

Probst then moves on to talking about NaOnka's reward challenge win and prize. NaOnka says the reward was "beautiful" and like a "celebration" as Holly shakes her head because she knows that Probst was only asking about the reward just to hear how much NaOnka enjoyed it. He's looking forward to grilling her over not giving that reward up to help her tribemates. "Realistically, you think you had any shot to win this game?" Probst then asks, having finally figured out that NaOnka is totally delusional and looking forward to exploiting that for our amusement. Of course, NaOnka says yes as the jury laughs. Well, Marty and Brenda laugh. Alina is fuming. "Based on what?" Probst asks. NaOnka credits her "drive." You know, that same drive that is making her up and quit right now. "This is amazing," Probst says. He hates her. But he also loves her, because he knows this is going to be great TV. Or at least it will salvage an episode otherwise wasted on Product Placements and quitters. "Please go on," he invites; "regale me with a story, woman." Does Probst even know where he is right now? What is he talking about? "Regale?" "Woman?" What a weirdo. NaOnka says she has the potentially winning combination of "drive, attitude, spunk, and charm." Yes, she said "charm." She says she doesn't just think she had a shot to win; she knows she did. Brenda buries her head in her hands, embarrassed for NaOnka.

Probst asks the winners if they enjoyed "watching" their Product Placement. Of course they did! They loved it! Ben adds that it was "relative" (I think he meant "relevant") to what they're going through right now because they have to find something inside themselves to stay in this game and so did the main character in the movie. I can't wait to see how bad this movie bombs. Ben says he hoped NaOnka would have gotten the movie's message, but apparently not. Finally, Probst addresses Holly's sacrifice and NaOnka's horrible selfishness. Brenda laughs about this, not particularly surprised, while Marty just buries his head in his hands and Alina continues to look homicidal. NaOnka says she "didn't want to" give up her reward. She wanted her last day in this game to be fun so she could "go out with a bang." Probst asks if NaOnka realizes how selfish that sounds. She says she doesn't care what people think about her (obviously) because this is who she is and always will be. And that seems to be working out really well for her so far in life, too, what with already being divorced and having no family or friends at her side when she was going through said divorce and working at the Y as a gym teacher.

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Survivor

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