Episode Report Card
Sara M: D | 1 USERS: F
Nothing Left To Suck

The "schoolyard pick" divides the contestants into the Yellow Team of Jud, Sash, Jane and the other Kelly and the Blue Team of Holly, NaOnka, Chase, and Ben. That leaves Dan as the only person not picked, and he gets to choose a team to root for and enjoy the reward with them if they win. Not only that, but Dan is also going to watch them from his vantage point of a giant armchair, which he sits in while swinging his legs in a most hilarious and even slightly adorable fashion. Probst tells us that Dan chose to back the Blue Team. Yeah, considering that the Yellow Team has Sash, Jane, and the other Kelly weighing it down, I'd say he made the right move. With that, the challenge begins. Both teams set about untying their Product Placements, and the blue team seems to be ahead until, suddenly, the yellow team's dummy is untied and freed. They are closely followed in the obstacle course by blue. The first obstacle is a tall wall that the dummy must be lifted up and over and then lowered to the ground, as dropping it would send them back to the start. Because Dan isn't playing, Probst feels free to praise the contestants on their hard work in this challenge and how they're all "digging deep." The other Kelly gets a giant dummy foot to the face as both teams make their way over the wall.

Yellow team has the lead going into the second obstacle, a bunch of ropes that the dummy must be lifted over and/or dragged through as the contestants cross through it. At one point, the dummy's foot drags across the ground, but Probst doesn't assess a penalty for it so I guess they are allowed to drop some of the dummy sometimes? The lead changes several times in the second obstacle, but yellow regains the slight lead coming to the third, which is a particularly evil-looking tunnel crisscrossed with several ropes. I don't even know how you can get a person through that, left alone a huge cumbersome dummy. Yellow's dummy gets stuck halfway through, while Ben's love of movie candy gives him the strength to almost single-handedly yank blue's dummy through the tunnel. As blue pulls ahead, the yellow team still can't figure out what their dummy is stuck on or how to release it, thanks to the other Kelly not being bothered to even look and Jane shouting at everyone to "push his ass through" instead of finding out. Blue team gets the dummy out of the tunnel and across the finish line, after which they promptly collapse from exhaustion. The yellow losers mutter that they'll be eating the chicken tonight while the others are at the movies. "I just want a hot dog. That's all I want is a hot dog," Holly says tearfully.

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