Survivor
You're A Rat

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Miss Alli: A | Grade It Now!
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Candice Canned

First vote: Jonathan. Second: Candice. Jonathan. Candice. Jonathan. Candice. Three to three. Candice. And...Candice, so she's done. She gives Parvati a hug. And then she and Adam make out for, like, an hour. Defiantly, like it's West Side Story or something. And I'm sorry to pick on anybody's technique on television, but they're the ones who brought it up, and...that does not look like a good kiss. That is one of those kisses where there's nothing happening, really, like they're just waiting until the timer runs out so they can stop kissing. It doesn't even look like they're particularly into it. The most hilariously awful part is that Nate starts, like, hooting, sort of, over the kiss. Like he's twelve, and he's watching his best bud feel a cheerleader's boob. He's all, "SCORE!," but like he's trying to hold it in. I can't even explain it if you didn't see it. It's that dumb. Everyone else laughs, because it's a spectacle, so you might as well treat it like one. Candice puts in her torch to be snuffed. "Well," says Jeff, "the kiss is nice. Maybe if it were love, he'd have given you the immunity necklace." Snuff! Hee hee. It's not a great line, in the sense that I think everyone knows that ain't love, but good for him. Jeff sends Candice home, and she tries to pull out a graceful exit at the end with "still smiling," and "have fun, love you," but it can't undo the rest of the episode, you know? So Candice is gone, fortunately, and Adam and Parvati are two little ducks, sitting there indeed, waiting to be stepped on. GOOD. Jeff says that the tribal council "speaks for itself," which is awesome, because it means he doesn't try to say anything meaningful about it.

Candice's parting words are her attempt at being gracious, but she fails miserably when she tries to get all "I can look myself in the mirror" about it. She says that the kiss was sincere. Sure it was, Candice. ["Seriously. We already have a Rob and Amber." -- Wing Chun]

Next week: Parvati learns that she's just not meant for menial labor when she injures her finger. She knew it! Yul isn't very comfortable being the Godfather. Heh.

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Survivor

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