Survivor
Survivor

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B+ | 519 USERS: C+
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The Last Temptation Of "Dreamz"

Gary tells us that it was a great experience, and as we watch him fall on his ass, hard, he says that going further would have been great, but this was fine, too. Winning a million dollars, going home with toxic insect bites...it's all about the journey, man.

In a great moment, "Dreamz" looks at Liliana's torch and says, "Liliana," reading it carefully, as if it's a name he's never heard before. Considering that my friend JWB sends me a text that says, "What's a Liliana?" every time her name is mentioned in any context, I kind of feel "Dreamz" on that one. She awesomely voices over that Survivor is just like real life, because sometimes, the best person doesn't win. Sometimes, the great people lose. Sometimes, the really best people only make it like a quarter of the way into the game. And, of course, sometimes, people who don't do well at something are really bitter.

"Rita, Miss Venezuela! One of the best moms in the world," Earl says. As we watch her fall on her face during a challenge, she tells us that she wants to teach her kids from this experience that if they have a goal, they can make it. Somebody says this every single time, and I never understand it. Shouldn't you pick something you succeeded at in order to teach that lesson? Or was the goal just getting on TV? Because otherwise, what's wrong with "you can have a great experience even if you don't meet your goal" as a lesson? Am I right? Who's with me?

"Anthony, I wish you could be here longer with us," Yau Man says. Anthony says that even though he was put down a lot, he's "a better person." Yeah, I'm trying to forget the entire Anthony arc myself, since it makes me kind of uncomfortable. Part of my brain expects to see Anthony wearing a skirt, and then I remember that was just Rocky propaganda.

Rocky. "Hey, there, Rocky boy, Mr. Boston," Earl says as he retrieves Rocky's torch. Rocky tells us that he's too much of a "straight shooter" for this game, and then we see him in his pink bikini top as he says you "can't show anybody nothing." The editors always really, really know what they're doing with this segment, which often saves it from total insufferability.

Lisi. She says she didn't have "the ability to stick it out," and we watch her go ka-fwump! on the ground, landing on her face during a challenge. I'm pretty sure that one of my friends actually predicted that moment had to be her moment during the MoDS as soon as it happened, but I can't remember now who it was. Too many sarcastic peeps who love to watch people fall down to possibly keep track. ["It wasn't me, if that helps any." -- Joe R] I do still go with the EEFP who pointed out that she was the first person to be injured during a mental challenge. Climbing, paddling, balancing...and Lisi was injured carrying out the instruction, "Go over there."

Survivor

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