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Sobell: A- | Grade It Now!
Things go better with pot

And after a particularly tense and silent dinner, everyone must be dying for dessert. Trina tries to liven up the conversation with, "Susan, those cabin journals are fascinating. There's one entry from 1948. All it says is, 'I'm as lonesome as Topaz.'" Susan explains, "That would be great-aunt Sally." Then she goes to get the brownies and the table erupts as everyone offers to go instead. Trina asks Bruce if he ever knew Aunt Sally. This is when it hits me that for these guys, 1948 is not a distant bygone era but part of their grade-school years, and we are, in fact, further removed from 1976 than they were from 1948. Excuse me, my mind is blown -- and I haven't even had any brownies. Anyway, Bruce briefly exposits on defiantly-single Aunt Sally, and Janet decides that now is a fine time to pick a fight with Trina. It turns out that Janet thinks Trina's the one who drew the unflattering graffiti. We cut to Bruce's eyes popping wide open, which I am going to take as flimsy proof that he's the one who did that, and Tom leans over to say, "You might want to help Susan with those brownies." Bruce leaves a cartoon puff of smoke in his speedy wake.

We cut to Bruce and Susan; she's fuming, "The minute I make a few changes in my life, Janet starts behaving like a forgotten child." We hear Tom say sharply, "Come on! Ladies!" and Susan concedes, "Not that Trina's making things any easier." She revs up again, "And then there's Roger. He can barely look me in the eye! It's like I've done something unspeakable!" Bruce nervously clears his throat, then stammers, "Uh, I probably should have told you this earlier, but I-I kind of mentioned to Roger that we've, we've, uh, done some ex-experimenting with the Deckers." We hear Tom implore again, and then back to Susan hissing the universal complaint of pissed-off wives everywhere: "What is the matter with you?" Susan turns back to the table for a moment, where Janet has just unleashed a full-throttle tirade, then turns back to Bruce to ask, "Is there anything else I should know?" Bruce replies, "Uh, yeah! Uh-uh-about those brownies?"

By this point, Janet's airing out her grudge regarding the July 4th party trick, and Susan comes over, slams down the brownies and yells, "That's enough, both of you." She then directs, "Roger, you and I need to talk. Everyone else, have a pot brownie. They're delicious!" Oh, Janet is appalled that someone's mucked with her world-famous recipe, but Susan cuts her off with, "Shut up! Janet! You're on vacation." She stalks outside to await Roger for their inevitable talk, and everyone else is left sitting in silence at the table. Then the Deckers plus Roger all lunge for a brownie. After a moment, Janet shoots down Roger's plan to flee and announces defiantly, "I am going to eat a pot brownie."

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