Episode Report Card
Sobell: B+ | Grade It Now!
"Fondue, Anyone?"

And now, as Bob Dylan begins singing, we see ...

... Sam laying back on BJ's bed and noticing that he kept his walkie-talking hidden under there ...

... Janet writing her recipe for rosy perfection salad on the wall ...

... Laurie and Doug singing along to the Dylan -- "It ain't me you're looking for." Well -- she's won the bet on lyrics and demands $5. He demurs: "I'm a schoolteacher. I don't make that kind of money." "Pay up, sucker!" she says. Doug does. This somehow leads to a discussion of the assorted scars and broken bones the two have weathered. Laurie says, "I'm a klutz." Doug's turning the dreamboat eyes on her, and he says, "That's not how I see you at all." Laurie asks, "How do you see me?" Doug stammers, "I think -- I think you --" but Laurie leans on in and kisses him like she means business. When she pulls back, she smiles.

Back at the party, Susan's drawing a picture of a window while Brad attempts to use her drawings to glean insight into her character. Sylvia warns, "Careful! Brad is rabid to psychoanalyze you." Susan gives him a flirtatious look and asks, "So what do you see?" Brad takes the marker and shows her: a sloe-eyed woman looking out of the window. Sylvia's got a look like, Honey, he draws ALL the women this way.

In the kitchen, Trina's flipping through the scrapbook Janet made. Bruce comes over and comments positively on the fondue game. Trina wryly points out that the party's likely to be known more for Susan's wallpaper blitz, and that it's right for Susan to get the spotlight. She then asks how things are between the two of them, and Bruce replies, "We're still feeling our way through it. Everything shifted, you know? We're just holding on 'til it all settles." "Just don't hold on too tight," Trina advises. She then pries Bruce's entire sexual history out of him -- not hard, since it consists of her and Susan -- and says, "Susan's one-of-a-kind, Bruce. Make sure you always let her be that, and you'll be just fine." She then lightly busses Bruce on the lips. Roger walks into the kitchen right then, and walks out again with a stiff "Sorry."

Cut to Bruce hastily explaining that it's not what it looks like. In fact, it's even more scandalous: "Susan and I have been experimenting." I love the use of that word -- it implies lab coats and scrupulous tests and peer-reviewed research, as opposed to romping with a man with a mustache and a knack for saying everything like he's in a porno flick. Roger calls experimenting "cheating," and Bruce protests, "No! Me and Susan and Tom and Trina, on the 4th of July -- jeez, Roger, do I really have to spell this out for you?" No, Bruce, I'm pretty sure Roger gets it. You've just shaken his elaborate rationalization for not acting on his feelings for your wife. That's all.

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