Episode Report Card
Sobell: B+ | Grade It Now!
Express Your (Most Authentic) Self

And now, we cut to ... Trina getting it on with both Tom and Luke. Tom ducks out with "I'll be right back," and Luke's all "More for me!"

We cut back to the gala. Susan notices Janet in a knot of Auxiliary wives, laughing and having the time of her life. She comes up to Roger -- who is also watching Janet -- and hands back the check. She also hands over the certificate for the dinner, explaining sweetly, "I owe her lunch." Bruce sweeps Susan away before Roger can protest further. He resumes watching Janet, his smile fading.

As the Millers leave, a drunken Rita passes by, waving her champagne glass and saying, "Bye, Susan! I'll see you next week at the hospital." Susan breaks the news that she's planning to volunteer, saying, "Maybe I can make it right [for me]. And until then, I can fake it." If Bruce had half a clue, he'd send Melinda a bottle of scotch as thanks for her talk with Susan, as it seems clear that Melinda's "a little subterfuge is necessary when remaining true to oneself" philosophy rubbed off.

We then cut to the Deckers' living room, where a shirtless Tom is sitting on the couch, lost in thought. Trina comes out to ask if he's rejoining the festivities. He tells her to go ahead without him. Trina asks what the real problem is, and Tom admits, "You and Luke -- it just feels different. Maybe it's 'cause he gets parts of you I'm never going to get." Trina asks what Tom means, and he clarifies, "Your childhood. Your family." (Ah, so Trina's estranged?) Trina says Tom's her family. He asks her tentatively, "You ever wish you married him instead of me?" Trina offers to send Luke packing, and for some reason, that inspires Tom to head back to the bedroom.

We then go to the musical montage of the evening. In short order: Laurie is helping Doug disassemble his classroom, with frequent breaks for kissing. Janet has come home and promptly scrapped her entire evening, while still in her fancy duds. Dude, I can not believe she and Roger did not hit the kitchen floor the minute they came in the door. Roger watches her, looking completely miserable. Then we switch to Trina, Tom and Luke, all in bed. Yes -- a two-guys-one-girl threesome on network television. Granted, it's network television a few minutes before 11 p.m., so no kids should be up and watching, but I am still a little amazed this passed the censors' muster.

And finally, finally Susan picks some wallpaper. For the curious: it's an ecru background with delicate, mushroom-brown leaf patterns and the occasional colonial blue and russet flower colored in. It's Susan, all right, expressing her most authentic wallpapered self.

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