Jane's hanging at her office, chillin', cold-kickin' it over some paperwork, when her cell phone rings. She answers. "Hey, Nick." She hears Nicki: "Where are you taking me?" Gary says, "You're gonna help me get my life back. The life I had before you and your sister ruined it." Jane covers the mouthpiece and tells Sam she needs a trace on this call. Sam picks up a phone and starts dialing. It's that easy!
Cut to Sam and Jane in their police car, lights flashing, tires screeching. "1143, 10-4!" shouts Sam, as Jane drives calmly. Sam tells Jane that Gary "drives a gray Cherokee and is headed north on the west side and changing cell zones fast." Fake Chemical Brothers plays to make us feel "engaged" with the "tension" in the "storyline."
Gary freaks out because he's being chased. Seems it would have made more sense just to head to Darcy's dorm for the takedown instead of causing dangerous road conditions. Nicki begs Gary to stop the car. And I don't know, there are so many cars on this chase, that when Jane finally spots him it doesn't make a lot of sense to me, because he's been pursued already by some other cop car. I will stop trying to inject logic and reason into this. Gary looks at Nicki and actually says, "What did you do? Did you call your sister?" You guys. Seriously. What are we doing? Is it worth this? Can't we get laughs elsewhere? When we keep watching this show every week, hoping it'll be funny, but instead just hope that the recaps will make up for the lack of this show's substance, you know who we are? We're Darcy. We're Darcy.
I will now recap this scene like I had always imagined I was going to get to recap this show, but because it's a cop show instead of a monkey show, I never get to do this. Fuck it. I'm doing it. Car Chase! Tires Screech! Tarzan leaps! Jumping Tarzan! Tarzan so mad. Pretty shoeless Tarzan fall to bridge. Bad man speed up car toward Tarzan. Nicki scream! Tarzan play chicken with car. Tarzan leap! Land on hood! Tarzan understand power steering and fucks with bad man's wheel! Screaming! Struggle! Bad music! Nicki scream for car to stop! Bad man stop car! Tarzan flies through air! He okay! He okay! Cops screech car to halt! Someone stole cop hubcaps! Jane runs out! Bad guy hold Nicki to himself, hold gun to her. Nicki whimper like stereotype! Wait, I have to stop here to say it's really strange that Jane has a moment where she wants to run to Tarzan to see if he's okay, but Nicki's screaming her sister's name, begging to be saved from the man with a gun. Jesus, Jane. Get a grip, girl.