Fake jungle. Wind. Sirens. Jane enters the jungle. "John?" She looks around. She can't believe this jungle! She touches it with awe. "John?" She wanders around. She sees Tarzan crouched on a shelf. "I came by to explain," she says. "And to apologize." I grab a couple of Tums. Tarzan leaps down a little. "Um. Sometimes when things get confusing for me, I need rules to tell me what to do. But lately I've found myself breaking rules that I believe in and making up ones that I don't." Tarzan leaps forward -- and HE'S SHIRTLESS! LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, WE HAVE SKIN. Blink. Blink. Jane: "I've been trying to explain right and wrong to you. But I think maybe you already know the difference. I should go." Jane tries to leave, but Tarzan has her by the wrist, and pulls her back: "Jane." He's all sweaty for some reason. He takes her hand and kisses it. Blink, blink. "John, I can't." Someone stop that stupid music! Tarzan takes Jane's hand and places it on his shaved chest. They stare at each other. Blink, blink. "John, I can't." Jane starts bawling. Lord. "[sobs]." Tarzan takes Jane's hand and puts it back somewhere, and strokes her cheek. He leaves. "[slow-tempo music plays]." Hee! Jane turns to what should be a pane of glass, but for some reason it's not right now, and a blast of wind hits her, whipping her hair up. She walks out to the edge of the roof. She looks around, but Tarzan is gone again. She clutches herself with both arms and looks up at the night, and this show once again ends with Jane looking out into the night, wondering what happened to Tarzan. I'm wondering what happened to Tarzan, and why we're watching a lame cop show instead.
Next week I'm sure it's all lies, but apparently Tarzan's wet, Xena and Clayton have a showdown, Nicki meets Tarzan, and Jane gets pissed off. We'll see. If you're not cancelled by then.