Tarzan

Episode Report Card
839 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
Call Me "Tarzan," Dammit!

The MWFs lift Tarzan to put him in the paddy wagon. Nash is on his cell phone. Jane is distraught at a comfortable distance. Michael pulls her away by her arm. She is woman, hear her roar, her problems mostly she'll ignore. Tarzan is thrown into the metal cage in the back of the Tarzanavan. Jane -- who loves people's names -- says, "Michael. They can't do this." What? They did. They've done it five times in two hours. Michael repeats, "'They can't do this'? Do you hear yourself right now? You're not thinkin' straight. What are you gonna do, Jane? Huh? You gonna throw your life away? All your plans. All our plans? For what? For him?" Am I watching a soap opera? Jane blinks a lot and then says, "No, Michael. No." Then: "Look. This is not about us, all right?" Michael tries to look soul-searchingly into Jane's eyes. But she quickly handcuffs him to the door of his own squad car, to which he responds, "Jane." Jane leans in and says, "I have to help him," to which Michael responds, "No, Jane. Jane! Jane!" And in the close-up of Michael's cuffed hand, we see a big ol' tattoo running across his wrist. This is the best part: Michael, after wiggling his hand to show that he's really cuffed to the door through the open window, casually reaches into his left-hand pocket and takes out his set of handcuff keys. Easiest problem-solving ever. I remember when we took that test back in detective school. "You've just been handcuffed. What do you do?" Answer: I pull out a set of keys that happen to open any pair of handcuffs in the world. I keep them in my pocket.

Tarzan

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