Useless Nicki walks to the front door, and announces to Jane that she was just leaving as Jane walks in. She asks Jane if she's okay. "[keys drop]." Nicki says she understands that Jane needs some time alone. "I've been lying to everyone I love," Jane says. Not really. I mean, Nicki already knew, and she didn't really love Michael. Who then? Sam? Jane: "Michael's dead. And I have all these feelings that I've never had before. I pray that they'll stop and then I'm glad when they don't." Nicki is so bummed out that she's going to be late for her date, but Jane's not done. (And neither is the song, but I can't keep quoting it because I've just gotten a nosebleed from the horribleness of it all. I'm not kidding. My nose is bleeding, but I don't want to stop because I'm so close to finishing this recap and I don't want to have to sit down with this episode again.) Jane: "I feel like I used to have it all figured out. Work. Love. I knew all the answers. So what's happening to me, Nicki? [sobbing] What's happening to me!?!" Nicki runs across the room and takes her [sobbing] sister into her arms.

Tarzan is wandering somewhere else. He leans into a dark room and finds another cloth-covered place. He opens more doors and finds a greenhouse, or some kind of jungle. There are doves cooing as Tarzan walks through the green. Why didn't Xena put him here in the first place? "I closed this place up so I could forget it was here," Xena says. Hi, did Tarzan wake you? Tarzan so sorry. "You used to live here," she tells him. "In this wing of the house. You and your mother and father." She says she couldn't go there after they disappeared: "This place has got your spirit. Your father's spirit." Xena walks away. Tarzan opens more doors and crouches on the roof ledge. Xena's right there, looking around suspiciously. She asks Tarzan if he'll stay. She and Tarzan smile at each other. Tarzan looks out at the sky. He looks back. There's no answer, since we're not sure how much longer this whole wreck of an attempted superhero franchise is going to be sticking around.

Next week Tarzan takes off his shirt. Whatever, you said that bullshit last week.