Wages Of Sin

Episode Report Card
Pamie: D+ | Grade It Now!
We All Go Out the Window

Xena's. "[breathing heavily.]" It's dark, and Tarzan's standing in his bedroom. He's still in those clothes, which seriously have to smell like oil and tetanus. I think Tarzan is trying to cry. He goes to the window. He opens it. Oh, for Pete's sake, you've been there three minutes! He heads out the window, and sees a cop car underneath. He looks around at the night sky. He climbs up and scales the building again. He reaches the roof. He crouches and looks over New York City. Once again, he listens to sirens as he crouches on another roof. He turns around and looks back at Xena's. He finds a window. He looks in, rubbing the dirt off the glass. He sees a bed covered in a sheet. He opens the window and crawls in. Tarzan has found bad music and a child's room. All of the furniture is covered in cloth. Tarzan takes one off and finds a bed. He touches a pillow. He holds it and sits down. "John," says the pillow. "Maybe this wasn't meant to be," the song sings. John pulls a tiny teddy bear out of the pillow. "Forever wasn't what you said/ You were someone else's voice instead." Tarzan uncovers some photographs of himself with his family. "Forever isn't what you meant/ One breath away from time well spent together." Tarzan is trying to cry as he looks at the picture. "Well, I should have known/ Our time was winding down." It sure is, Tarzan. I give you two more episodes. But I'm sure not holding my breath.

Useless Nicki walks to the front door, and announces to Jane that she was just leaving as Jane walks in. She asks Jane if she's okay. "[keys drop]." Nicki says she understands that Jane needs some time alone. "I've been lying to everyone I love," Jane says. Not really. I mean, Nicki already knew, and she didn't really love Michael. Who then? Sam? Jane: "Michael's dead. And I have all these feelings that I've never had before. I pray that they'll stop and then I'm glad when they don't." Nicki is so bummed out that she's going to be late for her date, but Jane's not done. (And neither is the song, but I can't keep quoting it because I've just gotten a nosebleed from the horribleness of it all. I'm not kidding. My nose is bleeding, but I don't want to stop because I'm so close to finishing this recap and I don't want to have to sit down with this episode again.) Jane: "I feel like I used to have it all figured out. Work. Love. I knew all the answers. So what's happening to me, Nicki? [sobbing] What's happening to me!?!" Nicki runs across the room and takes her [sobbing] sister into her arms.

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