Temptation Island
You Don't Have To Go Ho, But You Can't Stay Here

Episode Report Card
Stee: B | Grade It Now!
Skank You Very Much

John. He's going to pick someone who taught him a lot, and in the beginning it was physical but then when he would always babble about Shannon, she was okay with it. Mark L. Walberg nods like he understands (not busting him for the Shannon secret letters, by the fucking way) and John says everyone knows who it's going to be...and it's Nayla. "You've helped me more than I could ever imagine," he tells her. The girl hos kiss and hug each other. Nayla babbles that she's had a wall up for John but is willing to bring it down. Sort of like Cold War Germany, but skankier.

Mark L. Walberg tells the four booted girl hos that they'll miss them. Bye Kristin! Bye Caneel! Bye Pink! Bye big-tittied new ho! We hardly knew ye.

Ladies' side. The girls are there. Mark L. Walberg is there. The boy hos walk out. Rossi is dressed in a suit. Hee. There are eight boy hos, so I guess they also booted another, which we didn't see. Mark L. Walberg babbles about the dream date and "indulging" this unique circumstance and altering your life and Catherine is first. Commercials. Aw, man.

Next week. Last episode before final bonfire. Girls are forced to make their "heart-wrenching" decisions. This sets the stage for the "most intense twenty-four hours yet." Linda and Edmundo kiss. Final dates. A balloon ride. A plane ride. Debbie says something was heaven. Poor Costa Rica -- the skanks are increasing their roaming area. Passion. Passion. Linda talks. "Relationships thrust into complete turmoil." Okay, simmer down, FOX. John says that when you have a situation, you act on it. Kelley is confused. Mark is confused. (Yes, he is.) And final bonfire. Everything they hold dear is on the line, we are told. Catherine cries about learning you don't need someone. Mark cries, telling Kelley he saw her skankin' in bed with Keebler Tom. Kelley cries. And...that's it!

All right, people. Two more. Savor them. Bye!

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Temptation Island




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