So everyone's all dressed up with makeup and skull masks in the town square, because it's the Day of the Dead, and there are like ten people in the whole friggin' town, and they chat about how she used to watch him at school... and hey, yeah. School. Did they give up on that? Or does he still go but it's kind of like Homer Simpson's sporadic attendance record at the nuclear power plant?
At the hotel (looks like he did book the honeymoon suite), John fixes the Jacuzzi so they can enjoy the soothing power of bubbles (both of them are clothed, just so you know), and they chat about John living here, and he says sometimes he wished they'd have stayed here, away from everybody, which makes sense, since Dejalo appears to have a total of 12 people in it. "People suck," says Riley, helpfully. "Not just people," says John, like what's Riley supposed to make of that? John hates dogs? Riley starts blathering about not expecting to give a damn after meeting someone, because who's got the time? "I don't like getting attached to people," she says, which I'm sure is just what John "I booked the honeymoon suite" Connor wants to hear. He doesn't have any kind of reaction, so Riley cheers up enough to ask him why they were living in Mexico. He hesitates, so Riley says he's trying to think of either a joke or a lie, and he denies it. "Yes, you are! You have a tell!" she says. "I just don't want to sit around and talk about my messed-up childhood," he snaps. Well, good thing you didn't bring her specifically to your childhood HOME, douchebag! He says he just wants them to enjoy themselves. "Fine, enjoy yourself, John," she snaps, adding that she's sure they're not the only couple to find themselves in a honeymoon suite without knowing the first thing about each other. After a moment, he says, "You're right. People suck." Well, YOU do, anyway. So she smiles and hops in the water.
So it's later, at a restaurant, and John's impressing Riley with his command of Spanish, and he jokes that they serve a killer Thanksgiving buffet here, and they congratulate each other for getting to know each other NORMALLY, and I would really like people to start shooting soon. She's about to tell him what his "tell" is when some pushy old dude with a little camera snaps their picture and then starts expounding on the wonders of the digital age, and how he can e-mail them a photo. John gets testy with the camera-happy entrepreneur and offers him five bucks to delete the photos. Buddy's just about to accept when he recognizes John -- "You're Sarah Connor's son," he says, to John's chagrin and Riley's amazement. Well, he did used to live there. John tries to pretend -- really unconvincingly, too -- that Buddy has the wrong guy, and then excuses himself to speak to the guy privately, off to the side, behind a beaded curtain, which, you know, ain't exactly soundproof.
"I remember when the Connors left Dejalo. And I remember the stories that were told after you were gone," says the cameraman. John still tries to pretend he's someone else, so the shutterbug gets right to it: "These are pictures you wouldn't want the authorities to see," he says. John asks him how much. "Everything you've got," says the guy.
But this guy didn't count on Riley being an idiot; suddenly, she grabs the camera from his hands, which touches off a near riot in the bar. John yells for her to run, and she tries, but she winds up grabbed by a couple of Mexican police officers who happen to be at the bar (one of whom, kinda hilariously, doesn't appear to have bothered to get off his barstool to help stop the crazy gringos). John races outside, where the Day of the Dead parade is in half-assed swing, but he's got to stop and turn around, because he realizes girls don't sleep with guys who run away leaving them to deal with police in a foreign country. Or, at least, they shouldn't.
So John's being questioned by the cop and what appears to be a superior officer. John's story is that they're just tourists, which is true, except this makes the cop suspicious, because what, Cancun's not good enough for them? John says the guy with the camera just got bumped and he and Riley were running away because they thought a fight was going to break out. He admits to being 16, says he wasn't drinking, says his mother and uncle don't know where he is.
El Capitan makes John a deal, placing a phone in front of him: if they come to pick him up, he'll let John off with a warning. John tries Derek first, gets the voicemail, and he pushes a couple of buttons before hanging up. Next, he tries Sarah, who answers (we only hear her voice), sounding oddly insincerely happy to hear from him, and asks where he is. John pushes a couple of buttons on the phone, and the music starts to swell as he realizes that his mom's not giving him the appropriate signal. He tries again. No dice, and he hangs up, telling the cops she didn't answer. El Capitan tells the deputy to put John in holding, and to run his name through Interpol. Deputy el Genius asks John which name he should use: the real one or the fake one on his passport. Use "Bob Loblaw", just to see what turns up!
So the guard shows John back to the cell, with Riley there waiting. Well, that'll save valuable time when it comes to conjugal visits. The next morning, John's sleeping, and Riley, whispering, frantically calls the guard over. She tells him she needs his help, saying the guy is a total psycho and keeps putting the moves on her. It's a lame story because, as the guard points out, the two of them came in together. Riley appeals to his fatherly sense of compassion by saying her own father warned her about this guy, and "he was totally right." She says she just wants to call her family and let them know where she is. The guard, who I guess is as stupid as he looks, moves to unlock the door, which is when he's grabbed by John through the bars, who yanks him against the cell three times, knocking him out. Man, good thing that worked. "Lo siento, senor," says John as he and Riley get out of the cell. "No matter what happens, when you see daylight, you run," he tells her.
Back to Sarah's story, now, where she's in the back seat of Chrome Artie's ride as he's cruising to Mexico. He tells her that her strategy has changed since the last time they met; he tried to kill her then. "Now I'm going to kill you," she says. On the floor of the backseat are scattered documents. They shift, and Sarah sees a picture of Cameron.
Chrome Artie glances back. "She hasn't been careful. She's made mistakes. Not as many as you, but enough." Sarah wants to know how he found them, and Chrome Artie tells her the boy at the bowling alley told him. "You should have killed him," he says. Hey, constructive criticism is always welcome. "I'm not a murderer," says Sarah. "Who is?" asks Chrome Artie, so it's good that his rhetoric capabilities are completely up to date.
Sarah manages to free her duct taped feet, and she launches herself out of the backseat, over the trunk and rolls to a hard landing. Great idea! Now Chrome Artie will be slightly later in getting to his destination! That'll teach him! Artie stops the car, gets out, hauls Sarah up and tosses her in the trunk.
Well, that might have been the object of her plan, because she quickly finds a pop can to worry in half, so she can use a jagged edge to cut the duct tape binding her wrists. Outside, we can hear Latin music.