MONDO EXTRAS

The 2003-2004 Tubey Awards, Part Five

Best New Use of La-Z-Boy Technology
Could Pierre Bernard's Recliner of Rage on Late Night With Conan O'Brien be the most nerd-friendly thing on TV since The Screen Savers? Yes and then some. Sitting in his recliner, Pierre has expressed his displeasure at various geeky subjects like the availability of blank Viewmaster 3-D reels to Cartoon Network's anime scheduling. To see Pierre visit the set of Stargate is to behold pure, genuine geek love. Anger has never been so loveable. -- Glark

Worst Badge of Honour Award
Goes out to everyone who's ever proudly proclaimed, "I get my news only from The Daily Show!" Hey, we love Jon Stewart and we love The Daily Show, but damn, people, that's just sad. -- Glark

Worst Fallout From Boobgate
America's Next Top Model's heavily advertised orgy -- featuring several aspiring models and their Italian dates -- was toned way down, to the point of practically being edited out of the episode. Dammit, UPN, if we can't count on you for cheap thrills, we might as well just watch The WB. -- Wing Chun

Worst Appropriation of Tom Cruise Movie Technology Award
The "flexible rubbery masks that not only totally hide faces but also change your bone structure and are also completely removable and also don't leave a trace of spirit gum" that Alias borrowed from Mission: Impossible are not realistic. In fact, they're so stupid and unbelievable that when the first Charlie's Angels movie borrowed one for Drew Barrymore's character, we laughed. Nay, guffawed. So what in the HELL were they doing in the season finale of Alias? Sure, the show's hardly based in reality, but even the biggest fans couldn't suspend disbelief for this load of horseshit. Congratulations on your win! What's next, time travel via tesseract? -- Regina

Best Use of Time Travel Via Tesseract Award
Kudos and huzzahs to whomever it is on the Alias writing staff who was responsible for coming up with the not-unrealistic-at-all idea that Vaughn can be crapped out in a Los Angeles hospital with a punctured lung one minute, and on a cliffside in Palermo, Sicily with guns a-blazin' the next. Again, this show ain't about reality. We know that. But unless Vaughn went to the nearest ATM, withdrew an amount roughly the size of the national debt, and purchased himself his very own grounded Concorde, there's no way in HELL he could have made it to Syd's rescue in the time allotted. We look forward to Season Four when Vaughn will board an airship, head to Saturn, save Syd's ass, and return to the CIA in the time it takes to froth the head of a tasty cappuccino. -- Regina

Worst Treatment of a New Character -- EVER -- Award

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Comments

The 2003-2004 Tubey Awards, Part Five

Best New Use of La-Z-Boy Technology
Could Pierre Bernard's Recliner of Rage on Late Night With Conan O'Brien be the most nerd-friendly thing on TV since The Screen Savers? Yes and then some. Sitting in his recliner, Pierre has expressed his displeasure at various geeky subjects like the availability of blank Viewmaster 3-D reels to Cartoon Network's anime scheduling. To see Pierre visit the set of Stargate is to behold pure, genuine geek love. Anger has never been so loveable. -- Glark

Worst Badge of Honour Award
Goes out to everyone who's ever proudly proclaimed, "I get my news only from The Daily Show!" Hey, we love Jon Stewart and we love The Daily Show, but damn, people, that's just sad. -- Glark

Worst Fallout From Boobgate
America's Next Top Model's heavily advertised orgy -- featuring several aspiring models and their Italian dates -- was toned way down, to the point of practically being edited out of the episode. Dammit, UPN, if we can't count on you for cheap thrills, we might as well just watch The WB. -- Wing Chun

Worst Appropriation of Tom Cruise Movie Technology Award
The "flexible rubbery masks that not only totally hide faces but also change your bone structure and are also completely removable and also don't leave a trace of spirit gum" that Alias borrowed from Mission: Impossible are not realistic. In fact, they're so stupid and unbelievable that when the first Charlie's Angels movie borrowed one for Drew Barrymore's character, we laughed. Nay, guffawed. So what in the HELL were they doing in the season finale of Alias? Sure, the show's hardly based in reality, but even the biggest fans couldn't suspend disbelief for this load of horseshit. Congratulations on your win! What's next, time travel via tesseract? -- Regina

Best Use of Time Travel Via Tesseract Award
Kudos and huzzahs to whomever it is on the Alias writing staff who was responsible for coming up with the not-unrealistic-at-all idea that Vaughn can be crapped out in a Los Angeles hospital with a punctured lung one minute, and on a cliffside in Palermo, Sicily with guns a-blazin' the next. Again, this show ain't about reality. We know that. But unless Vaughn went to the nearest ATM, withdrew an amount roughly the size of the national debt, and purchased himself his very own grounded Concorde, there's no way in HELL he could have made it to Syd's rescue in the time allotted. We look forward to Season Four when Vaughn will board an airship, head to Saturn, save Syd's ass, and return to the CIA in the time it takes to froth the head of a tasty cappuccino. -- Regina

Worst Treatment of a New Character -- EVER -- Award

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12Next

Comments

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