Pecorino Party Palace. First Man Feta is congratulating everyone on their hard work. Billy informs Brigadier Boursin that there were traces of radiation found in Nuke's motel room, and witnesses claim they saw him carting around a suitcase that miraculously disappeared before the FBI and Billy showed up at the death scene. Chief Cheddar basically tells Billy to pick up the nearest spiny porcupine and shove it straight up his bunghole. Meeting adjourned.
Later that night, Grand Marshal Gruyere is heading home. Patton, reclining on a very comfortable stone slab, stops him. Patton reminds Engineer Edam that he recently asked Patton to prepare a report for the White House on current nuclear threats. "I'm going to be adding an addendum on suitcase bombs," says Patton. "No you won't," says Judge Jarlsberg. "Oh, yes I will," says Patton. "Oh, no you won't," says Captain Cabrales. "YES I WILL." "NO YOU WON'T." "WILL." "WON'T." "WILL INFINITY." "Dammit! Owe ya a Coke."
Anyway, Patton's all indignant that, as the National Security Advisor, it's pretty much his duty to inform the higher-ups about the current state of national security. I mean, IT'S IN HIS TITLE. Señor Scamorza keeps after Patton not to include this whole suitcase bomb scenario in his report and wants to know why Patton's so adamant about it. "Because it's the truth," says Patton. But, see, Mister Mozzarella isn't particularly interested in the truth, being the head of the CIA and all.
Patton's all, where's the bomb? Sergeant Stilton's all, if I told you the situation was contained and the American people are all completely safe, would you believe me? Patton's all, right, because you've been the pinnacle of honesty up to this point. Ticket-Taker Toscanello's all, well, everyone's safe, okay? So just shut the hell up and go search eBay for vintage Tonka Trucks or something. And with that, Admiral Appenzell walks off, leaving Patton to stew about truth, justice, and the American way, all while sitting on a cold marble slab beneath the etched phrase, "And ye shall know the truth and the truth shall make you free."
And the truth is, that's the recap folks. And I am outta here. Write me in rehab!













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