The Agency
The Year Of Lying Dangerously

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How do you say "sucks" in Indonesian?

Back in the Brief. Cheese wants to know when they can run Poca in the field. Jeanie tells him that she graduates in a month, and they can send her in then. She goes on to say that Poca needs a mentor to prep her. All eyes turn to Billy. And not just because he's wearing a supremely ugly tie.

Back on the Farm. Poca walks up to Billy and is all, mentor me, you loser. Billy's all, I'm still takin' notes. Poca's all, don't see a notebook. Billy's all, that's why they call us "covert operatives." Har har and HAR, Billy! I get it! You're the "funny" agent. Jeanie's the "soulful" agent, but you're definitely the "funny" agent.

Poca wants to know why she just can't go into the field right now. Billy says, "Duh! Because you haven't graduated yet, dumb-ass!" Or something like that. Poca defends her cred, but Billy reminds her that she just blew her own cover in, you know, A TRAINING MISSION, so she'd best just bring it down a notch or two. "I know the difference between a park and a war zone," she bitches. "Ohhhhh, really?" says Billy. "Been to many war zones lately? And, no, your bedroom doesn't count, you little harlot." (Note: I will be randomly inserting my own dialogue throughout this recap. Don't like it? I don't care.)

Hacker Designs, Inc. Miles is instructing Paige to study Poca's face carefully, because Paige is going to be solely responsible for creating eight years of Poca's fictional life. There's a good solid two minutes of nothing special going on as Miles and Paige discuss Indonesian transcripts and entrance stamps and Poca's passport. Then there's a good solid waste of my time as Miles discovers Paige's notes for her divorce hearing. Yammer yammer yammer Paige's divorce. "If you need any doctored photos of [your husband] with farm animals," says Miles, "you let me know." Heh.

Back on the Farm. Poca's getting busy with some padded gloves and a sparring partner while Billy blips and bleeps behind her about how she's an ideal candidate for this mission because she speaks Kayak. She's all high and mighty about what a mess it is down in Jakarta and how no one can fix it. Billy's all tweaky and lame about how the CIA doesn't want to fix it, they just want someone down there who will protect the interests of the United States. "The mines?" she asks snidely. "The people," he responds unconvincingly. Poca's chomping at the bit to get down to that island and start busting a move. Billy tells her to shut her pie hole and practice a little patience.

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The Agency

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