The Agency
Viva Fidel!

Episode Report Card
Erin: C | Grade It Now!
"Intelligence" doesn't really enter into it

Back down in the CIA lobby, Paige is looking slightly overwhelmed at the fact that she's actually entering the actual CIA offices. She walks quickly across the CIA seal on the floor as the camera pulls up to give us the full-screen view of the logo of the agency that makes wire-tapping possible.

"Who's the access agent?" asks Big Cheese in a voice-over. "A Miami national assigned to track Miami exile activity in Havana directed against the Castro government," says Patton, also in a voice-over, as we see him in his office shuffling papers into a folder marked, you guessed it, TOP SECRET. "How solid was this asset?" questions Big Cheese. At least I think he said that; he kind of garbled the last two words. "Dead solid," responds Patton, now standing in the Cheese's office. "He was murdered before he could deliver any specifics." Some random guy with a mustache, otherwise known as Rocky Carroll, says, "So...all we know is that there's a plan to kill Fidel Castro within the next forty-eight hours." "No, we know one more thing," says Big Cheese dryly. "Castro is coming to the U.S. tomorrow. Which means, if this is real...the assassination will happen here."

Ooooh, the suspense.

Cue the credits.

Man, my tape sucks. And here I thought that borrowing Wedge's super-deluxe Sony VCR would solve all my VCR issues from my last two shows. Not. Of course, it doesn't help that it's permanently set on SP instead of SLP because Wedge lost the fucking remote and that's the only way to switch tape recording speeds, which makes my pause-rewind-pause-rewind-pause actions even more difficult and irritating than normal. Wedge sucks. No, really. He sucks.

We're back. Aerial shot of a building surrounded by trees. This types across the bottom of the screen: CENTRAL INTELLIGENCE AGENCY. MCLEAN VIRGINIA. See? It's kinda like The X-Files when they come back from commercial and announce the next scene location. Only we don't have any Doggett or Scully to greet us when we return from getting our fourth Amstel Light from the fridge; instead, we get Big Cheese and Ally McBeal's ex-boyfriend.

The Spy Boys are gathered around a conference table, discussing how to handle the Castro situation. One guy suggests they all take the day off; this suggestion appeals to Big Cheese as he sips lukewarm Sanka out of an official CIA cup. Another guy thinks that they should let Castro's people handle Castro. Patton gets all uppity and says, "Gentlemen, with all due respect, one of our associates has been killed." Big Cheese just looks at him and says, "I have the highest respect for the source, [Patton]." Yeah. These two are gonna get into it at some point.

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The Agency




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