Amazing Race
Are You Sure This Is Safe?

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B+ | Grade It Now!
YOU GRADE IT
How egg-stremely satisfying

Colin meets up with Brandon and Nicole and the Twinkies and asks them if they want to work together so that Mirna and Charla don't beat them. Elsewhere, Mirna is still calling Colin and Christie "the scum of the earth" and so forth. Yawn. Brandon and Nicole are in for Colin's plan, as are the Twinkies, and Colin says he's going to ask Chip and Kim, too. Nicole interviews that Colin and Christie don't want to give information to Mirna and Charla, and although she doesn't feel that way, she's willing to cooperate with the plan. Christie haughtily explains "how it works" to her new alliance, saying that if you're "in," everyone shares information, and if you're not, you get no information. Thanks, Christie, I never would have figured it out without you. And also? You're not the queen of the eighth grade with your Bermuda bag smacking against your Esprit pants anymore, so just unclench, princess. Colin voices over that Mirna is "blatantly rude" to them (hmm, I wonder why), and that she tries to get other teams against him (which...he would never!).

Unsurprisingly, over at another counter, Mirna is still living in an alternate reality. We see her telling Linda and Karen that Colin "leeches on to weak people" and then "gets rid of them one at a time." Now...come on, sweetheart. Colin didn't pop Marshall's knees. How is he on the hook for that? Or Jim and Marsha? Or anyone? Doesn't it occur to Linda and Karen that this is, you know, crap? Apparently, it does not, because Linda just loves being with Mirna. Oh, well. As the Eagle-Eyed Forum Posters would say, lie down with histrionic crapweasels, wake up with fleas. Histrionic crapweasel fleas.

It's a shame, because if any of these people were making a lick of sense, they would immediately jump out into the lead, as far as sucking less.

In my favorite voice-over of the episode, Linda says, "We've been watching the game too much, and I know Colin and Christie are good, but dammit, Charla and Mirna are better." I'd like to see the research backing up that unusual claim based on the last couple of legs, but then...Linda's not exactly an authority on winning at this point herself, so perhaps it's not so surprising. Maybe she means they're better at using the word "habibi." Or at alienating people. Come to think of it, I think they're pretty much tied with Colin on that score.

Chip and Kim go with Colin's plan as well, and then in an interviews, Chip explains that there's this "Mirna camp," and this "Colin camp." "It's like the Clash of the Titans," he says. "They can't stand each other." Eh, "Clash of the Titans," "Battle of the Network Bores"...six of one, half-dozen of the other. Kim says, "Colin and Mirna are really, really competing against each other, and hopefully, they're going to knock each other out of this race." Now see, that is a smart attitude. Also, it would help you tolerate the behavior if you could say to yourself, "Well, the good news is, they may both be gone soon, and they can torment each other in Sequesterville."

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Amazing Race

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