Amazing Race
Clearly, I'm More Intelligent Than You

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B | 1 USERS: A+
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I'm a Guay? No, Uruguay!

In the Chip and Kim cab, he says that the only chance they have is if there's somebody who is "equally as..." She finishes the sentence: "Lame as us." Heh. Karli tells Kami (because she calls her "Kami," so I have a fighting chance) that they're "not out of it yet."

We go on a quick tour to catch up with several teams. Brandon zips into the pool as Nicole loudly praises his butt, and they grab a taxi. Alison and Donny arrive at the pit stop. They run inside. Colin screams encouragement to Christie as she completes the pool drop. They read the clue and go.

At the pit stop, Alison and Donny land on the mat. Phil tells them they're team number one. Eeeeevil triumphs yet again. As if that weren't enough, they've won a vacation. Booooo. Suck! Why couldn't they get cheap digital cameras? She interviews that she wants to work out a healthy relationship with him, instead of one that's so "dysfunctional." Yeah, I think television appearances are actually a common therapeutic recommendation for that purpose. It's right after "Take the time to say something kind to each other every day," and right before "Embrace infidelity."

Dennis and Erika finally get to the clue box in their cab, and they choose the zips. Elsewhere, Jim is getting suited up to zip, which he does. I guess he and Marsha finally found their way out of the catacombs. Marsha explains in a voice-over that she and dad were pretty nervous about seeing Dennis and Erika right behind them, because they knew that they were "a little gimpy" and might have trouble staying ahead.

Welcome, Marshall and Lance. You are team number two. Now, shut up. They don't, of course. Lance smarms that if he had known Miss Uruguay was there, he'd have been there much faster. Marshall cackles appreciatively. Look, doof. It's okay to lust after the greeters, but you have to be a little bit subtle about it.

More quick check-ins. Jim and Marsha zip. Welcome, Linda and Karen, you're team number three. Chip and Kim, still heading back to the hotel, as are KamiKarli and KarliKami. Bob and Joyce are ecstatic about being team number four. "We made it!" she sighs, and they smooch. Aw. Dennis and Erika zip.

In one of the funniest moments of the entire night, Mirna in the cab says, "I can't wait to see Phil! He's gorgeous." That's not the funny part, though; that's just accurate. What's funny is that then, hilariously, there's a cut to Phil with his little smile, and there's a little music cue that's like, "Zzzzzzing!", like you'd see in a cartoon where Prince Charming's tooth was giving off one of those starburst glimmers. Brilliant. Anyway, they land on the mat, and gorgeous sparkle-toothed Phil tells them that they're fifth. Mirna hugs Phil. Hey, Mirna -- I understand, but...hands off the kiwi. Mirna says she's sad, because she thought they were in third place. "We carried the cow like four extra blocks," she complains. Phil couldn't care less, and is already asleep by the time she gets to the word "cow."

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Amazing Race

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