Amazing Race
Colossal Showdown

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Miss Alli: B+ | Grade It Now!
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Personal Dynamics A-Go-Go

Paul and Amie are still desperately seeking their missing cab. Amie, finding something she has in common with the non-dearly-departed Light Hair and Dark Hair, mutters, "I hate France." What that has to do with her inability to find her transportation, I'm not quite sure. At any rate, by the time Paul and Amie locate a cab, it's being boarded by Nancy and Emily. Nancy says to the driver that both teams ordered a cab, and only one has showed up, so there's some confusion. Amie looks horrified, unable to believe that she is once again having cab difficulties. (She does not, however, call Emily a "fat bitch.") In fact, she's having such bad luck with cabs that I think if I were her, I'd switch to bicycles or roller skates or something. The silver lining is that the cabbie calls for another car, although this doesn't stop Paul from hurling something in frustration. Hey, Paul, don't take out your frustration on the French mountainside. Give le hoote, don't pollute. Once the environment has been adequately violated, Paul and Amie get to swearing a lot as Nancy and Emily reclaim the cab and take off. Paul is once again threatening to quit because Amie is so upset. He explains to the camera that he never wanted to do the race in the first place, and let me just say this: If you don't really want to do something like this, you shouldn't do it, because this is what will happen. All your little petty feelings that you don't really want to be there will leak out every day, which is what Paul is doing. He may not want to be there, but he came, and he should now suck it up.

Nancy, in an interview, says that she is having a hard time with the language she's hearing from some of the other contestants cough Paul and Amie cough. She also mentions the issue of "backstabbing," which again makes me really think I'm right that they didn't poach the cab, because if they did, she's so going to be struck by lightning. Nancy thinks Emily would be mortified if she knew her mom was saying these things, but frankly, I think a certain amount of that from your mom is expected. Your mom is supposed to be a little less wild than you are -- it's the nature of things. (Yeah, yeah, your exceptions are noted, Cher and Grace Slick.)

In their cab, Margaretta tells Davey she thinks she's handling things well. "You're doing extremely well," he agrees plainly. "You were brilliant last night, honey, thinking about having this cab waiting here for us. Absolutely brilliant." Margaretta leans on his shoulder and smiles. Meanwhile, Paul and Amie have EXACTLY the same argument they had in the cab after the Taxicab Skirmish -- he wants to quit, she wants him to stop threatening to quit, quaaaack quack quack. In an interview, Paul says that he would rather have Amie than a million dollars. The producers of Antique Roadshow immediately call to offer Paul a certain appraisal they think might be of interest to him.

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Amazing Race

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